Fun with Dick and Jane
by ohhowmarvelous
Summary: Jane Majors leads an ordinary life until her parents, Brad and Janet, are killed in an unexpected accident. What is the truth behind this, and what does Dr. Frank N. Furter have to do with it? Much better than it sounds because I can't write summaries.
1. Bad News

I finally decided to upload this. I've been writing it for over a year and couldn't stand waiting to upload it. I'm excited to see what you guys think….oh, and I won't be updating "Knowing Maureen" (if you knew what that was). That is, unless my RENT obsession comes back…

Disclaimer: I do not own anything except my OCs… Richard O'Brien owns everything else.

**Chapter One: Bad News**

Jane Majors was sitting at home watching mindless TV the day her life changed forever. Her parents, Brad and Janet Majors, had gone to visit their friend Dr. Everett Scott on the outskirts of Denton, and her older brother, Dick, was out somewhere doing god-knows what. Her parents had kicked him out after he had done something outrageous while she was at camp a few years ago. No one ever told her what he had done.

"There's never anything good on TV in the summer!" complained Jane, even though she knew that no one would hear her. The house was completely empty, and she only had the TV on because it was late at night and, without any background noise, the house was eerily quiet, even with the raging thunderstorm outside.

Jane turned the channel to the local station, DTV, and watched a commercial featuring children clamoring for a plastic, F-shaped box that contained a hamburger, french fries and a small toy. Macy Struthers, a local Denton celebrity, smiled and said the company slogan:

"_Farley Flavors Fabulous Fast Food! Feeding and Fortifying Families for a Fabulous Future!"_

"How many things does that guy own…" said Jane under her breath.

Farley Flavors, the head of DTV, was one of the most talked about, beloved people in Denton history. Personally, Jane despised him. Judging from the amount of places his plastered smile appeared, Farley was practically Denton's ruler.

After about an hour of flipping through the channels to see what was on (nothing but infomercials and reruns of old sitcoms), Jane decided to go to bed. She had just stood up from the sofa when the doorbell rang.

Jane was a little worried because, as any sensible person knows, people only ring your doorbell at midnight if something terrible has happened. And she was absolutely positive that this was the case.

Jane reluctantly opened the door and saw a police officer standing there, completely drenched from the rain.

"Are you related to Brad and Janet Majors?" he asked in a monotone voice.

"Yes, I'm their daughter," said Jane, fully knowing and dreading what the officer would say next.

"Well, I am sorry to inform you that their car was in a terrible accident and set on fire about an hour ago. We did everything we could, but we couldn't save them. I'm terribly sorry, but your parents are dead, Miss Majors."

"What?!" screamed Jane. "But they can't be!"

"I'm sorry, miss," said the officer.

Jane broke down and started to cry. She couldn't believe her parents were gone.

Jane didn't get along with her parents too well. She thought they were way too straight-laced and overprotective, and they thought that they needed to prevent Jane from becoming what Dick was like at all costs. Right before they had left for Dr. Scott's, they had the biggest fight yet. And it was over something Jane thought was ridiculous.

"What does it matter what kind of music I listen to, Mom?!"

"It matters because that music is all about sex and drugs! I will NOT have my teenage daughter listening to music about things she shouldn't even be hearing!"

"Talk about things I shouldn't be hearing… I heard you and Dad pretty well last night!"

Janet blushed. "That's ENOUGH from you, Jane. Why can't you be more like the Hapschatt's daughter, Lila? She listens to clean music. Her mother tells me her favorite music is Christian rock!"

"Lila's a backstabbing slut who doesn't care about anything but her reputation!"

"Well, at least she dresses presentably," mumbled Janet.

Jane rolled her eyes, and Brad walked into the room.

"Ready to go, darling?" Brad said to Janet.

"Yes, dear, but I don't think Jane should be left alone tonight."

"You're exactly right, Janet. With all that dark clothing she wears, Jane MUST be suicidal!"

Jane couldn't take it. "I have had ENOUGH of this! I'm FINE, I'm NOT suicidal, and you could DIE for all I care!" she screamed and she ran up to her room.

Brad and Janet exchanged worried glances and left.

That was the last thing Jane had said to her parents.

Jane called her brother and told him the bad news. Then, as she waited for her brother to come home, she cried herself to sleep.


	2. Funerals and Discoveries

I hope you're enjoying the story… trust me, it gets better. Remember, it's only the second official fan fiction I've ever written. The Frankenstein Place comes into play in the next few chapters…

Disclaimer: Ritz owns everything except the characters I made up.

**Chapter Two: Funerals and Discoveries**

The day of the funeral came all too quickly. Jane wore a black dress, her brother in a suit, as they rode in a limo to the church. Dr. Scott was riding with them. It was silent for most of the ride. No one had anything to say to each other.

Dr. Scott finally broke the silence when he cleared his throat and said in his thick German accent, "Your parents were good people."

Jane and Dick nodded silently.

It was getting even more silent than before when Jane said "Dick, where were you the night that it happened?"

"With Eugene and Terri at the movies, I told you that," snapped Dick.

"Sorry, I just wanted to know."

"You don't need to know ANYTHING, Jane!" shouted Dick.

"Yeah, well, you're starting to live up to your name."

"Children, children, stop fighting! We're at the church," said Dr. Scott.

The sermon was long and boring. Jane couldn't help but notice that the priest was different from the usual one. This priest had brown hair and spoke with a British accent. The usual priest was extremely elderly and barely made it through the mass each week without keeling over. She wouldn't have noticed this if her parents hadn't forced her to go to church with them every Sunday while they were still alive.

Jane also noticed that the priest seemed to be having fun at this funeral, smiling, almost laughing, as he talked about her parents' deaths in excruciating detail.

"Janet and Brad Majors' lives came to a tragic end when their car suddenly ignited," said the priest. "The car was burning so quickly that the two trapped inside had no chance of escaping. Then, it tipped, swiftly rolling down the embankment into a…"

"Excuse me," said an old woman, "But how can you be so insensitive? This is a funeral for god's sake!"

The priest only smirked. "Who's running this ceremony, love?"

There were also four strange people lurking in the back of the room that had never been there before. One man, two women, and a girl that looked about Jane's age. They were dressed so plain, they almost looked Amish. For a moment, Jane thought that maybe she just hadn't noticed them at previous sermons, but since she was never at this church for a funeral before, she guessed that they were probably just the people hired to help carry the caskets to the graveyard.

After the sermon, it was time for Brad and Janet's burials. Since the graveyard was right next to the church, there wasn't a long funeral procession. Jane and the other mourners watched her parents get buried under six feet of ground, and then the funeral was over. Jane had heard that her father had proposed to her mother in this very graveyard. It was ironic that, twenty years later, they were being buried at the exact location.

Jane noticed that the priest had gone to talk to the "Amish" people over by the sign at the front of the church that said "Be Just and Fear Not." Trying to figure out what they were saying, she began to inch closer and closer to the group.

"Well, this is the most interesting funeral I've ever had to conduct," said the priest, smirking at the "Amish" people in a rather sexy manner, which was quite disturbing for a priest.

"Do you wish for us to dissect them for future creations, master?" said one of the "Amish" women in a voice barely above a whisper.

Jane was shocked and disgusted. These people were planning on digging up her parents' graves so they could dissect their bodies for "future creations", whatever that meant! She decided that she needed to stop them before they did anything terrible.

"Excuse me," said Jane, "but I just overheard your conversation. Are you planning on digging up my parents' graves?"

The odd-looking people and the priest looked at each other nervously. A few seconds later, the priest turned around, exuding confidence.

"Miss Majors, is it?" he asked. Jane nodded.

"I'm very sorry, but you must have overheard us wrong. We plan on doing nothing of the sort. Grieving can do many strange things to a person. I suggest that you lie down and rest. You've gone through a lot in the last few days," said the priest, trying his hardest to even look a little sympathetic.

Dick, walking swiftly towards Jane, said to the priest "I'm sorry if she's bothered you at all…our parents' deaths have made her a little hysterical."

"She's done nothing of the sort, young man," said the priest while the odd-looking people smiled eerily.

Angry, Jane whispered to Dick, "Hey, I haven't been hysterical since…"

"Harry and Emily wanted to see us," said Dick, cutting Jane off, dread in his voice.

Jane groaned. Her grandparents were almost more annoying than her parents were. As soon as her grandmother, Emily Weiss, saw her, she pulled her into the tightest and most uncomfortable hug imaginable.

"We are so sorry about Brad and Janet, dear," said Emily, who then started sobbing into Jane's dress.

Harry, Dick and Jane's grandfather, looked at his wife in pity. "She's been a nervous wreck since she heard the news."

"I can see that," said Dick.

Harry sighed. "You kids have hard times ahead of you. We'd be glad to take you in, but the retirement home doesn't allow kids."

"That's all right, Grandpa," said Jane, still being strangled by her grief-stricken grandmother.

Harry shook hands with Dick and Dr. Scott, as only 'real men' did in Denton, and pulling a hysterical Emily off Jane, they left.

Jane, Dick and Dr. Scott went back to the limo. "We have to meet with a man later," said Dr. Scott.

"Why? For what?" asked Dick.

"He will be finding a legal guardian for Jane."

"Why can't I live with Dick? He's old enough to be a legal guardian!" shouted Jane.

"The system is very firm on their decision. Jane, you will be staying with… your brother's biological father."

Dick and Jane stopped dead in their tracks.

"Is this some kind of joke, Scott? Brad Majors is dead!" said Dick.

"Dick, Brad Majors is not your biological father."


	3. The Meeting

We introduce The Man Who Has Absolutely No Neck in this chapter…

Disclaimer- Richard O'Brien owns. I do not own. Don't steal my characters.

**Chapter Three: The Meeting**

Janet had never told Dr. Scott who Dick's biological father was, and to be honest, he had never wanted to know. Before his parents sent him away, Dick was the Majors' trophy child, always winning awards for academics and high school sports, and Dr. Scott didn't want any new information to spoil this. Because he had a damned good idea of who the father was.

Dick, Jane, and Dr. Scott sat in a room with dark wood paneling. The shelves and desks were littered with books and other trinkets. Jane noticed that the elderly man sitting in front of them at the desk had absolutely no neck. She stifled a giggle as the man began to speak.

"My name is Judge Oliver Wright. I am the only man in Denton who knows of Dick Majors' biological father. This may surprise you, but he is not an average sort of man. Nothing like Brad Majors."

The man began to pace. He lit himself a cigarette, and continued.

"Dick Majors, Majors…" he mumbled as he flipped through a book labeled "The Denton Affair, Continued".

"Ah, here it is. Dick Majors' paternity test. This was taken years ago." The man smirked and looked at Dick, who was clearly getting very nervous.

"Dick, your biological father's name is Doctor Frank N. Furter."

Jane couldn't help it. She burst out laughing.

"What kind of name is Frank Furter?" she laughed.

Dick still looked utterly serious. "What does the 'N' stand for?" he asked.

The man gave him a look like 'What kind of a question is that?', but still replied.

"Nelson. Frank Nelson Furter."

Jane laughed even harder.

"Young lady, this is no laughing matter," the man told her, giving her a look.

"Dick's father is a dangerous man."

Dr. Scott was still frozen from the shock of hearing the name he hadn't heard in twenty years.

"Yes, as I recall," he said, "he killed my nephew, Eddie, when he was only a young man."

"If Frank killed a man, why are you sending me off to live with him? I could stay with Dick, or even at one of my friends' houses! Aren't there any other relations?" asked Jane.

The man with no neck sadly shook his head. "If I had control of the situation, Miss Majors, I would not grant custody to Furter, but it was written in your mother's will."

Jane, Dr. Scott, and Dick all gave Judge Wright a dumbfounded look.

"Why would she ever do that?" asked Dr. Scott, outraged.

"I have no idea, Dr. Scott," said Judge Wright, shaking his head. He then pulled out a large piece of paper with Janet's signature on the bottom. Janet's will.

"It says so right here," said Judge Wright, pointing to a paragraph on the page.

"Great heavens, he's right!" gasped Dr. Scott.

"I will be taking you to the Furter residence tomorrow night, Miss Majors," said Judge Wright. "I suggest that you come too, Dick. You probably want to know who your real father is after all these years."

"This guy, Dr. Furter, I mean," said Jane. "Does he know about this? I mean, doesn't he have to sign some papers, or…"

Judge Wright cut Jane off and said, "We have already tried to reach Furter, but it seems that he has no phone. The only thing listed in the phone book is the address."

Jane suspected that he and Judge Wright knew something about this man that she didn't, and she was going to find out what it was.


	4. Meet the Furters

Hey guys...thanks for reading! I'm obsessed with finishing this story at the moment...I've had no time, though...I'm in my school's drama club, and whoever has acted before knows that tech week is pure hell. Then I tried out for my school's production of "High School Musical" yesterday...I never liked that movie, but I want to be in a musical so bad it is killing me. Well, enjoy! The rest of the characters get involved in this chapter (yay!).

Disclaimer: I do not own. Ritz owns it all. Except the stuff that I made up.

**Chapter Four: Meet the Furters**

Dick and Jane spent the rest of the day packing up the house. They were instructed to only take the most important things, as the rest of the items would be sold along with the house to pay for the funeral. Dick took all the photo albums and family heirlooms to his house, where they would be safe, and Jane took the few important items that she had in her room.

A few hours after Dick had left to go back to his house for the night, Jane found herself in her parents' room. She had something she needed to do before she left.

Jane's parents had a drawer in their room that they had not allowed her or Dick to open. After they were dead, Jane decided that since no one was there to stop her, she might as well look inside. Besides, there couldn't be anything too weird in there.

Jane opened the drawer and saw…nothing. There was nothing in the drawer except an old clothing box.

"That proves it…my parents were insane," muttered Jane. What could possibly be inside a clothing box that was so important?

Jane opened the box and was shocked at what was inside: Fishnet stockings, corsets, feathered gloves, and newspaper clippings.

"What the hell…" mumbled Jane as she read the newspaper clippings. The headline on one clipping said "Insane Couple and Local Professor are Abducted By Aliens; Town Believes it is a Lie". The clippings were on yellowing paper and were dated to about 20 years before.

Jane decided that she would take the box with her, too. She thought that maybe this Furter guy could tell her what this was all about. She didn't know it then, but she was absolutely right. Dr. Frank N. Furter knew all about this night 20 years ago.

It was finally time for Jane to leave her childhood home for the home of her legal guardian. She loaded all her bags into the back of the Judge Wright's Rolls Royce and was driven off (with Dick and Dr. Scott) to her new home.

As they were driving, Jane noticed that they were heading into the thick part of the woods, near Dr. Scott's house.

"Why does Dr. Furter live in the woods?" asked Jane.

"He lives in the old Frankenstein Place," said Judge Wright. "He most likely lives there for…secrecy."

It was starting to rain again. _"Just great…"_ thought Jane.

Judge Wright pulled up to a castle and the car stopped. Dick and Dr. Scott hadn't said anything the entire ride. Dick was too anxious and Dr. Scott was thinking about exactly what he had to say to Dr. Frank N. Furter.

Leaving the bags in the car, Judge Wright, Dick, Dr. Scott, and Jane walked up to the large, wooden doors with gargoyles on either side. Jane thought that it was going to be very strange living in a place like this.

Judge Wright rang the doorbell, and a few moments later, a balding man with long, stringy blonde hair opened the door and said, in a thick accent, "Hello."

The man had a hunchback and was wearing a butler's outfit, and in the house behind him, Jane saw two maids. One was slumped over the staircase and the other smacked her with her feather duster and said, "Aren't you supposed to be dusting?" The slumped maid glared at her and went back to work.

The man started eyeing Dr. Scott and Judge Wright warily. It was obvious that they knew this strange man from somewhere, too. But how many balding butlers with stringy blonde hair WERE there in the world?

"Yes, erm, hello," Judge Wright said, finally. "We are here to speak with Master Furter."

With that, the two maids looked up. One of them actually looked familiar to Jane, like a girl she knew from school. The younger maid saw Jane looking at her, mumbled a curse, and looked down. The other couldn't stop staring at Dr. Scott and Judge Wright with a shocked look on her face.

"Then I think perhaps you'd better… come inside," said the man, and he opened the door a little wider so Dick, Jane, Judge Wright, and Dr. Scott could enter the castle.

The room they were in was very strange. It looked like something out of a horror movie, with a coffin-shaped grandfather clock and a painting of American Gothic on the wall. Jane noticed that the farmers in the picture looked exactly like two of the "Amish" people from church.

_"What kind of guy must Dick's real father be if he has a house like this?!"_ thought Jane. He was obviously rich, since he had servants… and he must have a passion for old horror movies. Jane saw the butler walk over to some sort of screen, pull a lever, and say "Master, there are some guests who wish to see you." There was some sort of mumbled response, and the butler nodded and walked away.

"The master will be down shortly."

Judge Wright nodded, and the entire room was silent.

Jane asked the younger maid "Do I know you from somewhere?"

The maid averted her eyes as the second maid and butler stared at her, and said, "I don't think so. My parents and I are Dr. Furter's servants."

Dr. Scott cleared his throat and said "But Riff-Raff and Magenta are siblings. They could never have…"

And then it came to him.

"OH! Oh… they're…incestuous…?" he said, feeling sick to his stomach.

"And so is a quarter population of Transsexual, Transylvania!" said the younger maid, trying to defend her parents.

Her parents glared at her, and the maid mumbled "Forget I ever said that…"

_"So Frank's servants are two incestuous siblings with weird names and their kid who amazingly has no physical defects. Lovely…"_ thought Jane.

"Dr. Scott, how do you know them?" asked Jane. Dr. Scott just pretended to be picking at the loose string on his jacket.

Just then, a red-headed woman clad in sequins and tap-shoes ran into the room and asked the older maid, in a voice so squeaky that it almost sounded like one of The Chipmunks', "Magenta, have you seen my blue socks?"

Magenta sighed and said in a thick foreign accent "Have you checked the laundry yet?"

"Yeah, but they're not there. Do you think Frankie has them?"

"Why would he have your socks?"

"It was just a thought…"

"Did somebody call for me?"

Just then, a man in women's lingerie, fishnet stockings, and extremely heavy makeup swaggered down the stairs.

"Dr. Frank N. Furter," said Judge Wright. "We need to talk."


	5. He's Just A Sweet Transvestite

Well, from the title, I supose you know what happens...by the way, **_REVIEW!!!_** Let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I do not own, Ritz owns. Except for the stuff I made up.

**Chapter Five: He's Just A Sweet Transvestite**

All Jane could think was _"Who the hell is this?"_

She couldn't decide if she thought Frank was frightening, amazingly sexy, or both.

Which was kind of twisted since he was her legal guardian.

"Talk about what?" said Frank in a silky smooth British accent.

Judge Wright cleared his throat. "I regret to inform you that your, erm, friends, Brad and Janet Majors, were killed in a terrible car crash a few days ago."

Frank and the others all wore a look of fake shock.

"Why, that's simply AWFUL, Judge Wright. But what are the others here for?"

"I'll be getting to that soon enough. It seems that Janet wrote you into your will."

"Well," said Frank with a sly smile. "How exciting."

"Doctor Furter, there's no easy way for me to tell you this, but it seems that Janet has made you the legal guardian of her children."

"What?!" shouted Frank, shell-shocked. "Why would she ever do that?"

"We have no idea."

Out of the corner of her eye, Jane could see Magenta and Riff-Raff smiling evilly.

"I'm not the father of any of these children. It makes no sense to make me the guardian."

"That's where you're wrong, Furter," said Dr. Scott. "The oldest is your son."

Frank's eyes went wide, and he turned around slowly to face Dick, who looked like he was going to have a heart attack.

"Um, hi…" said Dick quietly. "Dad."

"I knew it!" said Frank. "I knew there was another Trans-, erm, family member in Denton! I could just feel it!"

"I'm Dick Majors."

"Well, Dick," said Frank as he chuckled at his name. "You didn't grow up to be what your parents expected, did you? I know your secret. I know about your, erm, longings."

Dick was speechless.

Jane made up her mind that this guy was nuts.

"It's why they kicked you out, isn't it?" Frank now had Dick backed up against the wall.

There was a long pause.

"How did you know?" Dick said so quietly that it could barely be heard.

"That will be learned in time, my dear boy."

Then Frank turned around to look at Jane.

"And you. You're staying here, aren't you?"

Jane silently nodded.

Frank turned back around and said, "The guests will be dining with us tonight. Riff-Raff, Magenta, prepare what you had planned for dinner. Charlotte, go get the girl's bags and bring them upstairs to the room you will be sharing (Charlotte's mouth opened to protest this, but Magenta put her hand on her arm to quiet her.). Columbia, just get out of my sight."

The sequin-clad woman, who was apparently named Columbia, gave Frank an angry look and stormed out of the room.

Dick stood against the wall like he was plastered to it, too afraid to move.

A loud, grunting sound was heard from another room.

"Oh, I must be going now," said Frank with a sly smile. "It seems that Rocky needs me."

With that, the transvestite went into an old-fashioned elevator that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere and disappeared upstairs.

"Who's Rocky?" asked Dick, finally saying something.

"His…plaything," said Riff-Raff.

The younger maid grabbed Jane's arm and pulled her outside to the car to get her belongings.

"So your name's Charlotte?" asked Jane.

"Yes. Charlotte McKinley," said Charlotte, not looking up from the car's trunk.

There was silence as Charlotte began loading Jane's bags out of the car.

"So…" said Jane, gathering the courage to ask the question she really wanted to ask.

"If your parents are brother and sister, then how come you don't have any defects? Don't take this the wrong way, but when you usually hear about things like that, they're about hillbillies out west with 17 kids who all have webbed feet."

Charlotte turned and glared at Jane.

"You can decide for yourself if I have any defects. If you want to feel even slightly welcome here, I suggest you never bring up that subject again."

With that, Charlotte dropped the bag she was holding onto the ground and ran inside. Jane gingerly picked it up and ran in after her, afraid of getting on everyone's bad side not even an hour into her stay at the castle.

The two girls entered the elevator and were completely silent.

After leaving the elevator, Jane followed Charlotte down corridors that seemed to never end, until, finally, they came to a door that Charlotte opened with an old-fashioned-looking key.

The room had walls covered in pop art, but still managed to look gothic with cold, stone flooring and a dark-colored wooden door.

"I love this room," murmured Jane.

"Yes, well, if it weren't for the master, it wouldn't be yours. I don't even understand why he did this. We have tons of guest rooms," said Charlotte angrily.

"C'mon, Charly, sharing a room will be fun!" said Columbia, who seemed to have popped up out of nowhere. "Your mom and I shared a room years ago, and it was great! You two will be as close as sisters before you know it! Now, do you have my blue socks?"

Charlotte sighed and said "No, Columbia, I don't have your socks."

"I'm looking anyway," said Columbia, clearly annoyed.

"Uh, Columbia, right?" asked Jane.

"Yeah?" said Columbia while looking in a dresser drawer.

"How come Frank was so angry at you just now?"

Columbia looked at Jane, began sobbing wildly, and ran out of the room.

"You shouldn't have brought that up," said Charlotte. "She doesn't like to talk about it."

"Why?" asked Jane, now interested.

"To make a long story short, she used to be with Frank, but then Frank started shagging this pizza delivery guy so he broke up with her, but then the delivery guy fell in love with Columbia so Frank got jealous and stole his brain to put into Rocky, and then killed the delivery guy and forced the entire house to eat him."

Jane stared at Charlotte, jaw dropped.

Charlotte smirked and said, "Get used to it."

**_REVIEW!_**


	6. Author's Note

Guys, I am SO sorry I haven't updated in so long...I write this story on the Windows 95 in my room and then use floppy disks to import it into the computer with internet. Long story short, the computer we use more often needed a mouse so the computer I write the story on has no mouse now and, all of a sudden, has finally started to die and I can't get to the story at the moment. Currently, I have maybe three chapters left (there's maybe 28 right now) and I really want to share this thing with you guys, especially LittlexNell who reviewed (thank you SO much... I was about to abandon the story because I didn't think anyone liked it...). Hopefully I'll be able to salvage it tomorrow...and I'll be sure to upload at least three chapters...maybe five! So uh...keep reading, and keep being Rocky Horror fangirls/boys!


	7. Very Little Bonhomie

Yes, I have DONE IT! I have decrypted the Windows 95!!!! Thank you to EVERYONE who reviewed, and I forgot to thank my best friend Sarah for reading every chapter before I post it and telling me what she thinks, even though she doesn't love Rocky the way I do.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. The fabulous, marvelous, wonderful Richard O'Brien owns it all. Lucky bastard.

This fanfic is going to be really long, so enjoy…I already have an idea for a sequel, too.

**Chapter Six: Very Little Bonhomie**

Everyone was sitting at the dining room table, waiting to be served by Frank's 'humble servants'. They were also waiting for Charlotte and Jane to show up. The entire table was silent as Frank scowled and tapped his fingers on the table impatiently, waiting for them.

"So, erm, Frank N. Furter," said Dr. Scott. "You look…well."

"Young?" said Frank with a pompous smile on his face.

"Well, uh, yes. Not a day older than the night…" Dr. Scott's voice trailed off.

"It's all thanks to my marvelous new invention."

Riff-Raff, who was sulking in the back of the room, mumbled something and went back into the kitchen.

"After almost five years of research, I found the fountain of youth! And all it takes to stay young for all eternity is…" Frank smiled slyly.

"Well, I would never tell YOU that, would I?"

Just then, the doors of the dining room burst open.

"Sorry we're late," mumbled Jane, averting everyone's eyes and finding the nearest empty seat. Charlotte went through the back door to the kitchen to help her parents.

"Well, it's about time!" Frank said with a huff.

As if on cue, Magenta, Riff-Raff, and Charlotte burst through the kitchen doors with something that looked like some sort of meat. They began to serve everyone at the table.

"So what are we dining on this night? Human?" said Dr. Scott defiantly.

Columbia looked uncomfortable in her seat.

Frank seemed unfazed.

"My dear Dr. Scott, why would we ever eat fellow members of the human race? Though I suppose you may have your own cannibalistic tastes…" Frank smiled devilishly.

Dr. Scott slammed his fists down on the table.

"You know perfectly well what I'm hinting at, Furter! You know what you did to Eddie!"

Jane looked up from her plate, suddenly interested. "What did you do?"

Frank smiled. Magenta and Riff-Raff looked slightly nervous.

"HE ATE HIM! THE BASTARD ATE HIM!" screamed Columbia suddenly. She stood up from her chair.

"And HE didn't just eat Eddie, he made everyone else eat him, too! HE MADE ME EAT MY OWN LOVER! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT HAS DONE TO ME OVER THE PAST 20 YEARS?!"

Columbia ran out of the room crying. Magenta ran after her.

The table was quiet, except for the sounds of Columbia's screams, Magenta consoling her in the kitchen, and Frank's quiet laughter.

"Hm, well," said Frank, still laughing. "Wasn't that pleasant?"

Then he leaned over the table to look Jane straight in the eye.

"And you've just found out exactly what you've gotten yourself into, haven't you?"

He paused.

"I suggest that you go back to your room now."

Jane looked down at her meal. She had barely taken one bite. She was still hungry, but now she wasn't sure if she could eat anything anymore. She ran upstairs to the bedroom.


	8. The First Night and Flashbacks

As you can tell by the title, this chapter features a FLASHBACK. Yup...uh huh.

Disclaimer: I do not own Rocky or Shocky. That O'Brien fella owns everything.

**Chapter Seven: The First Night/Flashbacks**

On the way upstairs, Jane realized that Eddie was the "delivery guy" Charlotte had told her about. Poor Columbia had been through a lot. _"But you can't tell when she's talking to you with that cartoon character voice,"_ thought Jane.

Once in her new, shared bedroom, Jane changed into her pajamas and climbed into bed. It was late, and she was exhausted from having one of the strangest days in her entire life.

Lying in that new, unfamiliar bed, Jane couldn't sleep. She had lived in her old house her entire life, and sleeping in this new, bizarre one was very different. She tried to convince herself that she was only on a trip and that she would be going home tomorrow, back to her house with the white picket fence and her big brother and her hilariously uptight but loving parents…

Her parents. Jane started to cry in the bed. She never thought that she would be this upset if Brad and Janet died when they were alive.

The memories started streaming back. Birthday parties, first days of school, and one day in particular that she couldn't erase from her mind: the day she had to stay after school in first grade after she had gotten in trouble. Her parents had been very disappointed in her, and this is where their bad relationship with Jane had started.

The only reason Jane remembered that day was because it was the first time she had ever gotten in any kind of trouble in school. She had been the teacher's pet, the girl that every student in room 12 had hated. She was scared to death to be a "bad kid", all alone in the classroom, except for one other girl whom she couldn't remember the name of.

Jane remembered that the girl had huge, curly, blonde hair, almost like an afro. She smiled at the memory.

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"Hey, why is your hair so big?" Jane had asked. The school had indoor recess that day because there was a huge thunderstorm outside.

"It just grows that way…" the girl had said, not looking up from the book she was reading, as she was terribly shy.

"It looks like cotton candy. Yellow cotton candy!" Jane had shouted. Everyone else in the classroom had heard and was now making fun of the girl with the curly hair.

"Hey, can I eat your hair?" asked one boy. The class laughed.

"Of course you can, just rip off a piece! Jane, rip off a piece for us!" screamed Lila Hapschatt, glaring at Jane with such force that she felt she had to do it.

Jane looked around, torn. She knew it was wrong to cut the poor girl's hair off, but she was in love with her new found popularity among her classmates. She decided to do it.

Jane came running from the side of the room with a pair of scissors. She grabbed a huge chunk of the girl's hair and cut it off as the other students chanted 'Cut, cut, cut!'. The girl screamed.

The teacher walked in the room and Lila shouted "Mrs. Granby! Look what Jane did!"

The next thing Jane remembered from that day was sitting in the close-to-empty classroom after school, the poor girl with a chunk of her hair missing glaring at her with a tear-stained face. The teacher had called the girls' mothers, and they were coming soon for a conference with her.

Jane stared at the floor, counting the tiny specks in the linoleum, trying not to think about the terrible thing she had done. She felt awful, and decided that from that day on she would hate Lila Hapschatt with every bone in her body.

The classroom door opened, and a woman with the same curly hair as her daughter except colored red and pinned up walked into the room. She was wearing a green nurse's outfit and looked very angry.

"Ah, Miss McKinley, I'm glad you could join us," said Mrs. Granby.

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Jane was shocked out of her memory. McKinley? Where had she heard that name before?

And then she remembered.

Charlotte's last name was McKinley!

So THAT was why it seemed Charlotte hated her so much! She was the girl with the cotton-candy hair! It wasn't just Jane's inability to make good first impressions after all. From that day on, Charlotte had worn her hair pulled back into a bun or a ponytail. That's why she didn't recognize her until she arrived at the castle, where Charlotte had let her hair down.

Suddenly, Jane felt terrible. Even more terrible than the day she had attacked Charlotte in the first place. Even though she had terrorized Charlotte when they were younger, her family was now welcoming her into their home. Well, sort of their home. Frank N. Furter ran the place, obviously. And now it made sense why Miss McKinley had been wearing such a strange outfit. She had been Magenta all along!

Jane tried to remember more about that day.

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Miss McKinley glared at Jane and tried to calm down Charlotte, who had burst into tears when she walked into the door.

"So…" said Mrs. Granby, fluffing up her hair. "Where are the cameras? This WILL air on Dentonvale, won't it?"

Miss McKinley glared at the teacher. "I asked them not to film this, if you don't mind."

Mrs. Granby's heart sank. "Oh," she snapped, and started to go through some papers.

A second later, Janet Majors, Jane's mother, ran into the room.

"Sorry I'm late, the car was having trouble again and…" Janet saw Charlotte crying and hanging on to her mother. "What happened?"

Mrs. Granby sighed, not even looking up from her papers. "It seems that Jane has gone and cut off some of Charlotte's hair.

Janet gasped. "But that doesn't seem like her at all!"

Mrs. Granby shrugged.

Miss McKinley stood up and glared at Janet. Jane remembered there being a look of shock on both of their faces, like they knew each other or something.

"Keep that spawn of Furter away from my daughter," Mrs. McKinley said firmly and so quietly that only Janet and Jane had heard.

She started to walk away, but then looked back at Janet and laughed. "You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss."

Then she turned and left with Charlotte.

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Spawn of Furter? She couldn't have said that…or did she? She couldn't have meant Dr. Furter. She wasn't Frank's child, Dick was. Jane decided that she was probably just remembering things wrong. Miss McKinley had probably said "spawn of the devil". She had gotten that a lot from the teachers at her school already. But why would she say "spawn of Frank" if Jane wasn't even related to him?

Jane had just assumed that maybe her mother and Miss McKinley knew each other from high school or college, but she realized now that maybe it had something to do with those whorish clothes and the newspaper article that she had found.

And what was Dentonvale? It must have been some TV show, since Mrs. Granby had mentioned cameras, but Jane had never watched TV much as a child so she couldn't be sure. Did Magenta ever have a TV show? Nothing made any sense to Jane, so she decided that she would figure this all out tomorrow.

Just when she was about to fall asleep, Jane heard the door open and shut quietly. She figured that it was just Charlotte going to bed, but she was completely and utterly wrong.


	9. Attempted Seduction

Disclaimer: I own nothing, I am a poor teenager. Richard O'Brien owns everything.

**Chapter Eight: The First Night, Part Two: Attempted Seduction**

"Jane! Are you still up?"

Charlotte was whispering from the other side of the room.

"Yeah, couldn't sleep," said Jane, wiping her tears.

Charlotte sat on the side of Jane's bed.

"It must be really hard for you with your parents dying and all," said Charlotte, moving closer to Jane and putting her hand on Jane's leg.

Jane started to panic. What was Charlotte trying to do?

"Yeah, it's weird. Them being gone. But you get used to it."

"Yes, I guess you do."

All of a sudden, Charlotte began to kiss Jane's neck. Jane screamed and tried to fight her off, pulling her hair.

All of a sudden, Charlotte's hair slipped off.

Jane screamed again. "You're not Charlotte!"

A loud, accented, baritone voice laughed and said "Yes, but isn't it nice?"

Jane gasped. "IT WAS YOU! And you're supposed to be my guardian!"

Jane could see Frank smirk in the moonlight. "Yes, but that wasn't MY choice, well, was it?"

He went right on kissing her body, moving farther and farther down….

"GET OFF ME YOU BASTARD!" screamed Jane.

Frank laughed. "Make me. Come on, you liked it, didn't you?"

"I swear, make one more move and I'll scream. I'll wake this entire house up!"

"What makes you think they're asleep? And besides, why would they care?"

Jane panicked even more. She was running out of escape methods.

But then she remembered one.

Jane thrusted her knee into Frank's groin and ran away. Frank groaned and fell off the bed, clutching his privates.

Jane ran out the room and farther and farther down the hallway, trying to open every door she passed by. They were all locked.

"HELP!" she screamed. "HE TRIED TO RAPE ME!"

"Your first time, huh?"

Jane looked over to see Magenta, dusting one of the pictures on the wall.

"I wouldn't let him. I kicked him in the privates and ran."

Magenta looked at Jane, impressed.

"Most of the master's guests cannot resist his charms."

"Yeah, well, first of all, I'm only fifteen. Second of all, HE'S MY LEGAL GUARDIAN!"

Magenta just stared at Jane.

"Sorry about yelling," said Jane, trying to calm herself down. "I'm just not used to people crawling into my bed at night and trying take advantage of me."

Magenta shrugged and went back to dusting.

"You'd better hurry if you don't want the master to follow you," said Magenta.

"Uh, thanks," said Jane, and she ran off down the hall.

Jane ran past identical locked doors for what seemed like ages, until she found one room that looked like some sort of lab. The room had pink tiles and a huge tank in the middle of it.

Jane was about to pass it by for a room with a door behind it, but she heard Frank yell "Don't think I'm going to let you off easy for that!" from close behind her and ran into the room.

She frantically searched for a place to hide, until she found something that looked like a stage, with a huge velvet curtain covering it. Jane ran behind the curtain into what seemed like a master bedroom.

"_OH CRAP!" _she thought. This bedroom had to be Frank's. All the other bedrooms she had seen had been more like hers: drab and castley. Jane could tell even with all the lights off that this bedroom had a huge bed and gothic candleholders in it.

Deciding that there was no time to lose, Jane shoved herself into a small space under the bed and tried desperately to hold her breath.

She could hear the _clack, clack_ of Frank's stilettos as he walked through the lab and chuckled to himself.

"What does a man have to do for a good shag?"

Jane was disgusted. Why did he want to have sex with HER of all people? She wasn't the slightest bit appealing, but something told her that Frank was such a sex fiend that he didn't care.

"Riff-Raff, did you see the new girl run in here a moment ago?" Jane could hear him ask. How was Riff-Raff in here? Did these people always just drift in the background and appear like that?

"No, master," she could hear Riff say.

"Well, keep your eyes out. Or I may have to fuck your sister for a change."

Jane could hear the _clack, clack, clack_ of Frank's stilettos again, which meant he was probably leaving the lab, but she decided that she wasn't going to move an inch until the morning, when she knew she was safe.

All of a sudden, a hand lifted the bed sheet covering her face. Jane screamed.


	10. Discovered

This chapter is incredibly long…..well, for my stories, anyway…enjoy!

Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING. Richard O'Brien is the very lucky owner of RHPS.

**Chapter Nine: The First Night, Part Three: Discovered**

Surprisingly to Jane, the man holding up the bed sheet started to scream, too. The scream sounded nothing like Frank, but Jane didn't budge from her hiding place since Frank had imitated Charlotte's voice so well. For all she knew, it could be Frank screaming… for some odd reason. The scream almost sounded like a caveman though, more a grunt than a full-fledged shriek.

Jane heard footsteps again and panicked. She tried to stuff herself farther and farther under the bed, but there seemed to be a box or something in the way.

"What is it now, Rocky?" an annoyed voice asked.

Jane could see a pair of feet step into the small room.

The voice sighed. "Rocky, there are no monsters under your bed."

Rocky cried out even louder.

"All right, I'll check," the voice said, clearly exasperated.

Jane winced as a different hand lifted up the bed sheet.

The sheet was lifted high enough for Jane to see that the hand belonged to the butler, Riff-Raff. She let out a sigh of relief as Riff-Raff gasped sharply and swore to himself, clearly surprised.

Rocky started grunting again, his worst fears confirmed.

"Whoever's under there, show yourself immediately. I don't appreciate this stupid game you're playing," said Riff-Raff, trying to hide his obvious fear.

Jane came out from under the bed, laughing.

"I scared you guys pretty bad, didn't I?"

Rocky continued his screaming, as Riff-Raff glared at Jane.

"What were you doing in here?"

"Frank just tried to rape me, and I needed a place to hide. Kind of stupid that I hid in his bedroom, huh?" Jane said with a laugh. Riff-Raff continued glaring at her, clearly not amused.

"The master has already finished in here for the night. You nearly scared Rocky half to death."

Jane looked at the blond-haired blue-eyed man peering out at her from the blankets pulled up to his chin.

"So…this is Rocky?" she asked curiously.

"Yes…one of the master's many creations," said Riff-Raff.

"I can only guess what he uses them for," said Jane with a laugh.

Jane tried to get closer to Rocky, but Rocky flinched and started his grunting again.

"It takes him a while to be comfortable around new people," said Riff-Raff.

"I can see that," said Jane.

There was an awkward silence in the room, besides Rocky's panicked grunting.

"So… is it safe to hide out here?" asked Jane.

"Yes… the master has many bedrooms. The one he rests in is in the castle tower, and since he is finished here, he will not come back until tomorrow night."

"But…doesn't he work in the lab during the day?" asked Jane.

Riff-Raff sighed. "The master doesn't do any of his own work. Ever since we were in college, I've done all his experiments for him. The only thing he ever does is give orders. Technically, he's not even a doctor."

Jane was confused. "Then why do you have to work for him? Does he even pay you?"

"No," said Riff-Raff.

"Then why are you still here? He has no authority over you. You can just leave, right?" asked Jane.

Riff-Raff looked slightly flustered. "So, erm, will you be comfortable staying under the bed tonight?"

"Yes, but…. You haven't answered my question. Why do you still work for Frank if he has absolutely no authority over you and pays you nothing?" asked Jane.

"I…have to get back to work," said Riff-Raff, and he walked out of the bedroom.

Jane sighed. Just when she had finally gotten Riff-Raff to talk, he chickens out and goes back to work. What was wrong with people in this place?

Jane was just about to go back under the bed, when she noticed that Rocky was staring at her, intrigued.

"Um, hi," she said.

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Riff-Raff went out of the lab and into the hallway to find Magenta.

"I just had a close call with the new girl," he said.

"Did you tell her?" asked Magenta.

"Almost, but you know I would never tell her without your consent, my most beautiful sister," Riff-Raff said while caressing Magenta's cheek.

Magenta smiled at her brother's touch, but suddenly sighed in sadness.

"After all these years I though we were finally finished with those earthlings, but after the incident a few years ago with Charlotte at school, I knew that we'd never be through with them until they were dead."

Riff-Raff smiled. "Yes, a gas leak can be one of the most dangerous things to happen while driving a car."

Magenta laughed quietly. "Yes, and a fake will was one of the most brilliant ideas you've ever had. But tell me again, why do we need the Furter children in the castle?"

"All in good time, Magenta. This is one of my more elaborate plans," said Riff-Raff.

Magenta glared at her brother. "The last 'elaborate plan' you had got us arrested for attempted murder on our home planet."

"But this one is better than simply killing Furter. The Queen said that if we bring Furter's children back to Transsexual, we will be free to live on the planet once more, what we've always wanted," said Riff-Raff, smiling.

"But even if we bring them, we'll still have to work for Furter for the rest of our days, and after we're gone, poor Charlotte will be here even longer," said Magenta with sadness in her voice.

"That's where you're wrong, my dear sister," said Riff-Raff. "The Queen only said we needed to bring Furter's _children_ back with us."

Magenta gasped. "So you're saying that we just leave him stranded on Earth?!"

Riff-Raff smiled. "Precisely."

"But won't we still have to work for his children?" asked Magenta.

"We'll threaten them with the laser until they agree to free us. This plan is foolproof, and it's all because of that 'freak' fire that killed every living Furter on Transsexual," said Riff-Raff with a knowing smile.

"I'm so glad we did that before they sent us back to this dreadful planet," said Magenta, smiling.

"Yes, and since the new Queen is so naïve, she'll believe us when we tell her that Furter died in a terrible lab accident," said Riff-Raff slyly.

Magenta and Riff-Raff started laughing, and their laughter grew louder until Frank came walking down the hall and said, with a scowl on his face "Magenta, Riff-Raff. Get back to work."

As Frank walked away, Magenta asked Riff-Raff quietly "Has Charlotte left already to finish her part of the plan?"

"Yes, though reluctantly," said Riff-Raff. "I'm not sure she wants to be a part of it."

"Yes, but remember that she's never had to burn a house down before," said Magenta with a smile. "It was lucky that we placed that tracking device on the Majors boy all those years ago, so we could know when he was away from the house."

"Do you think it's possible Columbia could help with the plan?" asked Riff-Raff. "She must have a grudge against the master since he's shunned her for almost two decades."

Magenta looked at the floor in sadness. "The poor girl is still in love with him. She's been trying all these years to get over Furter, but her feelings are too strong. You would think she'd hate him after what he did to Eddie, but I've never understood her."

"Well, I was hoping that she would help us," said Riff-Raff. "After all, we went through all the trouble with…"

Just then, Charlotte came sprinting down the hallway.

"Well?" asked Magenta, a questioning look on her face.

"The house is completely burnt out. Dick wasn't home, so he's in for a shock later on tonight," said Charlotte, gasping for air.

Riff-Raff smiled. "Excellent. But why are you so out of breath?"

Charlotte, finally able to breathe right again, said, "I ran the whole way home, Father. Though I was almost caught by the police."

Magenta had a concerned look on her face. "Did you lead them here?"

"No, I lost them a few blocks back," said Charlotte.

Magenta sighed. "Arson can't be good for your permanent record at school."

"Yes, but we'll be gone from this dreadful planet before the summer is over," said Riff-Raff. "Now I suggest you get to bed before the master finds you and assigns you a job."

"Okay, father, but you and mother should get some rest, too," said Charlotte. "I still don't understand how the master can just keep assigning you work like you don't have to sleep at all."

Magenta rolled her eyes. "Yes, well, the Prince of Transsexual always gets his way."

Charlotte smiled. "Speaking of Furter, did he offer himself to Jane yet?"

"He tried," said Magenta with a mischevious smile. "She kicked him in the groin and ran. She's hiding in the lab at this very moment."

"Wow," said Charlotte with surprise. "I didn't think she had enough guts to do that. But I've been proven wrong before, I guess. See you in the morning."

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Dick Majors was just getting out of his car when he saw that his house had been completely burned down. Shocked, he paced back and forth on the charred grass trying to figure out what to do before calling 9-1-1. He knew this wasn't accidental. Dick Majors had made more enemies than friends over the years.

He decided that he'd go to the Frankenstein Place, where his sister was, to see if he could stay there for a while. After all, the place was so huge that it could probably sleep about 30 people, so they must have room for him. And he was a little nervous about his sister living there in the first place, so this way he could keep an eye on her.

Dick got reluctantly back in his car and drove off through the woods to the Frankenstein Place, the last place on earth he wanted to be after meeting his biological father.


	11. Creature Of The Night?

This is the last chapter I'm posting tonight, so enjoy! I might have more technical difficulties in the future, but hopefully not…

Disclaimer: I own nothing, Richard O'Brien owns all.

**Chapter Ten: Creature Of The Night?**

While the McKinleys were plotting their plan, Jane was off doing something very predictable. Well, for her mother, anyway.

Rocky continued to stare at Jane, a look of amazement in his eyes. Jane was a little unnerved by this, and backed away from the bed.

"I, uh, I'm…sorry I scared you," said Jane.

Rocky nodded, and patted the bed, pantomiming for her to sit.

Jane sat on the bed reluctantly, wishing that this terrible, bizarre night would just come to an end. She looked down and saw that Rocky's foot was chained to the floor.

Jane pointed to the chain and asked "What does he do to you?" Rocky just stared at her, his eyes big with wonder.

Jane sighed. "God, why did I even ask? Of course I know what he does to you. Same thing he tried to do with me."

It was silent for a long time.

"Did you let him?"

Jane looked around frantically, trying to find where the voice had come from. Then she looked at Rocky in amazement.

"Did you just talk?" she asked.

Rocky looked down shyly. "Yes, but the master doesn't know. He likes to keep his playmates dumb and mute so they don't appear smarter than he is, I think. I guess there was some kind of mix-up in my creation process, but I'm the only experiment here that can talk."

"Wow," said Jane. "Doesn't it annoy you to have to grunt all day to get what you want?"

Rocky smiled. "You didn't answer my question."

"What was your question?" asked Jane.

"Did you let him have his way with you?"

"No," said Jane, smiling slightly. "Just kicked him in a very unpleasant spot and ran."

Rocky smiled sadly. "You're more brave than I ever will be."

Jane looked down, suddenly shy. "So, um," she said. "Frank's never heard you talk?"

"Only the night I was created," said Rocky. "He must have whipped Riff-Raff for months for 'ruining his experiment'. Apparently I was born babbling something about the Sword of Damocles. Weird, huh? I guess Frank just thinks I grew out of the talking."

Jane suddenly remembered something.

"Um, Rocky?" asked Jane.

"Yeah?" said Rocky.

"Have you ever met anyone named Janet Weiss or Brad Majors?"

Rocky's spray-tanned body paled. "I can't tell you about that."

Jane gasped. "So you DO know them! I KNEW IT! I KNEW that box had something to do with this weird castle!"

Rocky shushed her frantically. "Don't shout! The master might hear you!"

All of a sudden, the sound of stilettos could be heard from nearby.

"Just go along with this and trust me, I'll explain later about everything," whispered Rocky, panicked.

All of a sudden, Rocky pushed his lips aggressively against Jane's and pulled her body into a tight embrace. The curtain separating the bedroom from the lab flew open, and a shocked Frank N. Furter stood staring at his creation and what he thought was a prudish and chaste Denton girl.

"Rocky!" screamed Frank.

Rocky gave a defiant look at Frank.

"Dr. Furter!" screamed Jane.

"Majors girl?!" yelled Frank, shocked.

Jane rolled her eyes. "It's JANE! JANE! It's painfully generic and not hard to remember, so you have no excuse to call-"

"You're just like your slut mother," said Frank angrily, cutting Jane off.

Jane opened her mouth wide to rebut Frank, but Rocky elbowed her in the side to quiet her.

Frank began pacing across the lab floor. "I don't understand. You won't let ME touch you, but you let that, that THING fuck you to its heart's content!"

Jane's eyes went wide and she started sputtering. "What you saw, that was it. That was all that happened, believe me!" she managed to get out. She began to laugh nervously as Rocky looked at his feet, clearly dejected by his master's words.

Frank looked at the floor in disgust. "To the dogs," he said quietly.

Jane looked around, not having the slightest idea what he was talking about. "Wha-"

"TAKE HER TO THE DOGS, MAGENTA," said Frank louder, pointing at the lab door. Magenta, who had seemingly just appeared in the room, grabbed Jane's arm and forcefully led her down a dark corridor, apparently where the dogs were.

Frank then looked at Rocky, repulsed. "And you. Will you ever learn?"

Rocky looked at the floor.

"Under no circumstances are you allowed to fuck anyone but me!" said Frank, fire in his eyes.

There was a long pause as Frank glared at Rocky until the poor creature started to quiver.

"Do you understand?" asked Frank, slowly but vigorously.

Rocky nodded.

Frank smiled. "Good. Now I trust you will have a good night's rest and be ready for the big day tomorrow."

Rocky gave Frank a confused look.

Frank rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me you forgot about this year's convention? Now don't let me hear from you again until tomorrow, or a more deserving playmate will get the coveted lab-side room."

Rocky's eyes went wide.

Frank smiled evilly and strut out of the lab.


	12. To The Dogs?

Whew, sorry that took so long! I've been at school until 5:00 most days because of rehearsals, and midterms came around and...ugh. No time for Rocky...again. Here ya go, I'm going to compulsively upload a couple chapters again!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, the fabulous Richard O'Brien owns it all.

**Chapter Eleven: To The Dogs…?**

Magenta led Jane down a series of hallways until she finally stopped at a door, opened it, and flung Jane inside it. Jane looked around the room and saw that Riff-Raff was also in it, looking extremely bored. Strangely, there were no dogs to be seen in this small, dark room. Magenta locked the door behind her and said in a hesitant voice "Riff, are you sure you want to do this?"

Riff-Raff nodded, and Jane was suddenly very afraid. What were these people going to do to her NOW? She suddenly felt as if she couldn't hold her feelings in anymore.

"So far this week, my PARENTS HAVE DIED, I've been nearly RAPED, been FORCED to move to some WEIRD old castle full of PSYCHOTIC, INSANE, SEX-CRAZED people, and have generally been SCARED out of my SKULL. And NOW you're finally going to do it. You're going to KILL ME, AREN'T YOU? Fine. Do it quick. I have nothing to live for anyway."

Jane burst into tears as the Riff-Raff and Magenta stared at her, showing no emotion whatsoever.

"Stop your sobbing," said Magenta. "We've had enough of that from Columbia for years."

"We don't mean to kill you, we only wish to give you some necessary information if you are to be a permanent guest at the master's home," said Riff-Raff.

Jane wiped her eyes, and looked at them, still a little fearful for her life. "Fine. What do you need to tell me?"

Magenta and Riff-Raff shared a nervous glance.

"Well, it's a long story," said Magenta.

Jane gave the siblings a disbelieving look. "You people are nuts."

"Riff-Raff, I told you this wasn't going to work!" said Magenta angrily.

"You expect me to believe that you're aliens, from the planet Crossdresser?" asked Jane, trying to keep from cracking up.

"It's TRANSSEXUAL!" screamed Riff-Raff.

Jane looked at Riff-Raff, surprised. She had never heard him raise his voice above a mumble before.

"And, technically," said Magenta, just as annoyed as her brother, "You're the aliens, to us."

Jane began to laugh. "So, this means, if your story is true, my brother is the only living heir to your planet's throne?"

Riff-Raff and Magenta stared at Jane silently.

Jane's laughter stopped. "Oh my god, you're serious."

"But you are wrong," said Riff-Raff. "Your brother is not the only heir."

"Who else could there be?" asked Jane.

"You," said Magenta.

Jane realized that her memory had been right. Magenta HAD called her the "spawn of Furter".

"I remember you calling me the 'spawn of Furter' that day at school. Now I know it was you!" said Jane.

Riff-Raff and Magenta looked up, surprised.

Flustered, Magenta said, "You must be mistaken. All this time on Earth, we've never left the castle."

Jane smiled wickedly. "I knew it was you because, seriously, how many people with the last name 'Furter' are there?"

Riff-Raff and Magenta just stared at her.

"A lot?" asked Jane, surprised.

"Yes, but we destr- I mean, they're all dead now," said Magenta, clearly covering up for something.

"But, how did you know my mother? I remember you were talking to each other that day. And how did my mother ever have sex with THAT guy?" asked Jane, but then she realized it.

This all had to do with the clothing box of lingerie.

Jane's eyes went wide. "So THAT'S why my parents, the most irritatingly conservative people in the entire world, had a box full of feather boas and lingerie hidden away! THEY WERE HERE! It all makes sense!"

Riff-Raff smiled darkly. "Smart girl."

"So that means…" said Jane, not fully believing the words on her lips, "Janet DID do it with Frank, and my brother IS the only living heir."

Magenta rolled her eyes, about to explode. "You've missed the point. We just told you a minute ago that YOU ARE THE SECOND HEIR TO THE THRONE OF TRANSSEXUAL, TRANSYLVANIA!"

"Oh yeah! I totally forgot!" said Jane, unfazed.

Magenta and Riff-Raff exchanged disbelieving glances.

"So…if my brother and I are the only heirs to your kingdom…does that mean we actually have to go there?"

Riff-Raff sighed heavily for the umpteenth time, and Magenta looked like she was about to slam her head against the wall.

"So..um…" said Jane, now afraid again, "Is that a yes?"

"Maybe she's not as smart as we thought," said Riff-Raff under his breath.

"Well, darling, you know who raised her," said Magenta.

"I'M RIGHT HERE, YOU KNOW!" said Jane.

Riff-Raff and Magenta didn't seem to care very much.

"So…when do we have to leave with you?" asked Jane, dreading the answer.

"When it is arranged," said Riff-Raff, giving a knowing look to Magenta.

Jane gave a sigh of relief that they weren't leaving right that moment. But then she remembered what the siblings had just told her.

"About that night," said Jane. "What happened? Why were my parents here?"

Magenta and Riff-Raff exchanged tired glances. This was turning out to be a very long night.


	13. The Makeover

Wonderfully long chapter time! Yay!...

Disclaimer: Richard O'Brien owns the world.

**Chapter 12: The Makeover**

The siblings tried to explain the events of that fateful late November evening to Jane. With each passing minute, everything was becoming clearer to Jane, especially why Frank had said she was "just like her slut mother".

"But why does he care so much about Rocky?" asked Jane. "Doesn't Frank have other creations?"

"Yes, but Rocky was his first, and has always been the most privileged creature in the castle," said Riff-Raff.

"And Columbia is of no use to the master anymore," said Magenta. "Since the master has learned the very secret to life itself, he can create whatever being he finds the most pleasurable one day, and then scrap him for another the next. He has hundreds of them frozen in the lab's freezer."

"And tomorrow he is unveiling 'his' newest discovery," said Riff-Raff. "He _claims_ that he has found the fountain of youth."

Jane looked at him strangely. "He _claims_?"

"Like I said before, I do all the work," said Riff-Raff.

"The most important Transylvanians in our universe will all be at this castle tomorrow for the convention," said Magenta. "Which leads us to our next topic."

Magenta pulled a pair of scissors from behind her back. Behind her, Jane could see bottles of hair dye and what looked like an everlasting supply of makeup.

Jane's eyes went wide. She hadn't cut her flowing, dark hair for four years.

"You are NOT doing ANYTHING to my hair!" screamed Jane.

Magenta rolled her eyes. "Would you rather be laughed at for your hair tomorrow, or not?"

"What's so strange about my hair?" asked Jane, insulted.

"It's 'strange' because it reveals you are an earthling, and not Transylvanian," said Riff-Raff.

"What's so bad about that?" asked Jane, clutching her hair and backing away towards the door.

"If you don't look Transylvanian tomorrow, they will never accept you as an heir to the throne," said Magenta.

"And don't even try the door. It's locked," said Magenta, flashing Jane a huge smile.

Jane sighed, and slowly said, "Fine. Just do it."

Magenta squealed in delight and ordered Jane to sit in a half-broken chair.

"Well, what do you think?" asked Magenta, holding a broken mirror in front of Jane.

Jane was shocked at first. She had chin-length hair that was pointed in the front, sort of like Liza Minelli in "Cabaret", only it was dyed a deep purple. She had more makeup on her face than she imagined was possible: her cheeks were snow white, her eyes a deep contrast with dark shadow and liner, and the reddest lips she had ever seen.

"…I love it!" said Jane, amazed at her own words. "So you guys always have wild hairstyles like this?"

"Most of the time…" said Magenta, tossing random items of clothing out of an armoire.

"Here. Try this on," said Magenta, holding out a daringly low-cut sleeveless leopard-print blouse, a tight, incredibly short lime green mini skirt, purple stilettos, and a pair of fishnet stockings.

Jane put on the outfit, which surprisingly fit perfectly. She looked at herself in the broken mirror, not quite knowing who she was anymore.

Magenta turned around and gasped. "It's perfect! No one's going to doubt you are the prince's daughter tomorrow… Riff, what do you think?"

Magenta kicked Riff-Raff in the side, who was crumpled up on the floor, sleeping.

"Uh…what?" said Riff-Raff drowsily.

Magenta glared at Riff-Raff, and gave Jane an encouraging look. "He loves it," she said.

Jane began to help clean up the makeup and hair dye that was all over the floor, while Riff-Raff continued to sleep.

"I've been thinking…" said Jane.

"Mmm?" asked Magenta, preoccupied with scrubbing purple dye off the floor.

"Since Dick is five years older than me, how did my mother get pregnant with me, if Frank IS my father?"

Magenta looked up at Jane. "Haven't we told you enough for one night?"

"Well…" said Jane.

Just then, the doors burst open, and a very wet Dick was seen standing beside Frank, who had a robe, curlers, and a mint julep facial mask on, and seemed very annoyed. Riff-Raff jumped about a foot off the ground, surprised out of his sleep.

"Your brother wishes to see you," snapped Frank, scowling.

"Oh, and Magenta? Great job on the girl's transformation," said Frank, not even looking at Jane.

Then, Frank looked at Jane, and his face softened for a split second. "My…daughter's transformation."

Then he slammed the door and left.

Jane's eyes were wide, and her whole body (not just her powder-covered face) was pale.

"How did he know?" she asked, looking at Magenta, who shrugged.

"I told him," said Dick.

Jane looked at him even more surprised. "How did YOU know?"

Dick laughed. "Au contraire, how did YOU know?"

Jane motioned over to Riff-Raff and Magenta.

"So, how did YOU know?" asked Jane, smiling.

Dick sighed. "It's a long story. Too long for this late at night. You do know it's 4 AM?"

Dick got a closer look at Jane's transformation, and his jaw dropped in surprise.

"Oh Jane, what did they do to you?" asked Dick, moving towards his younger sister.

"Oh, just gave me a makeover for the convention tomorrow. Are you staying for that?" asked Jane, hoping he would say yes.

Dick sighed. "I'm gonna be staying here for a long time. See, while I was at the club, my house burned down."

Jane gasped. "But you just bought it a year ago! Do you think it was intentional?"

Magenta and Riff-Raff shared an amused glance.

The Majors siblings talked for a while longer, and finally, Riff-Raff broke the silence.

"Magenta and I have been here far too long…" mumbled Riff-Raff.

Jane nodded, and asked "Dick, are you staying here tonight?"

Dick shrugged. "I don't really have a choice…plus, I kind of wanted to keep an eye on you."

Magenta and Riff-Raff left the room, and Dick said quietly, "Jane, I don't trust them. They're not our kind. Liars, they conned our parents…"

'When? That night 20 years ago, when they got engaged?" asked Jane.

Dick looked at her questioningly, and Jane said "They told me just about everything. Believe me, it's been one hell of a night."

"Well, if you must know, it wasn't that night," said Dick. "Remember when Mom used to tell us how she used to have her own show on DTV about fifteen years ago?"

"Yeah. But of course she was lying," said Jane. "Mom had always been kind of full of herself…"

"She was telling the truth," said Dick. "And two people that worked on that show? Nation and Cosmo McKinley."

Jane was surprised. "Riff-Raff and Magenta have relatives on Earth?"

"No," said Dick. "They ARE Riff-Raff and Magenta."

Jane was shocked. But then she remembered what had happened that day in the first grade.

"Was that show called Dentonvale?" she asked.

Dick was surprised. "Well, yeah, that was Riff-Raff and Magenta's hospital show, where Mom started out before going on Faith Factory. How did you know?"

"Remember when I cut off that girl's hair in the first grade?" asked Jane.

Dick smirked. "Yeah. Mom and Dad were pretty pissed off at that."

"Well, that girl was Charlotte. Riff-Raff and Magenta's kid," said Jane.

"So that's why she was acting like she hated you," said Dick.

"Yeah, and I remember that when her mom came to pick her up she was wearing a nurse's outfit, and the teacher mentioned something about cameras and a show called Dentonvale," said Jane.

"Wow, you have a good memory," said Dick.

"Come on, then, tell me how they conned our parents!" said Jane impatiently.

Dick sighed. "Magenta and Riff-Raff were ordered by Frank to keeps tabs on our family…I guess that they wanted to make sure our parents never told anyone about that night. Anyway, they decided to have a little fun with them. Since they worked on a medical show, they decided to use Dad as an inmate, drugging him as heavily as they could. That's why his memory's never been that great…they tried to brainwash that night's memories out of him."

Jane was speechless. How much could she possibly learn of in one night?

"They even got Columbia in on the plan…I think her fake name was Annie, or Abigail or something. Anyway, Judge Wright told me all about this in the car on the way back since he worked at the TV station at the time this happened," said Dick.

Jane groaned. "My brain is about to explode from everything that everyone has told me tonight…are you sure you're not drunk and making all of this up?"

"No, they made me designated driver for the night," said Dick, clearly annoyed about this. "Oh, and Farley Flavors is our uncle."

"WHAT?!" shouted Jane. "Why does HE have do be a part of EVERYTHING in this town?"

"He's dad's enstranged brother," said Dick. "Trust me, if he knew we existed, he wouldn't do anything about it. You can still pretend he's dead."

"Good," said Jane. "And I don't pretend he's dead, I just like to ignore him since everyone else won't shut up about how wonderful he is!"

Dick stared at Jane. "Is that the only reason you hate him?"

Jane sighed. "Yeah, pretty much."

Smiling, Dick asked " Well, anyway, you wanted to know how I knew that you were Frank's kid, too, right?"

"Yeah, sure…" said Jane, suddenly realizing how exhausted she was.

Janet Majors was driving down a wet, slippery road, her four-year-old son sleeping in the back seat. She hoped that she still knew how to get where she was going. She smiled. Tonight, Dr. Frank N. Furter would learn that he had a son.

She had just gotten the results of the paternity test that day. She had waited four years after Dick was born because she was deathly afraid that Frank or Rocky, and not Brad, would be the father, but now she felt strangely at peace with the whole ordeal.

Janet parked in front of the old Frankenstein Place, what most people in Denton called the old castle that had seemingly just appeared in the woods one night. The castle looked like it had been deserted for years, but she knew that wasn't true. She and only two other people in the entire town of Denton knew that wasn't true.

Janet lifted her small son into her arms, who mumbled "Mommy, where are we going?"

"Shh, sweetie, we're going to see your daddy," said softly.

This comforted the boy at the time, who was thinking that they were going home and they would see Brad, but he was wrong. Dead wrong.

Janet walked up to the door, carrying her son, and rang the doorbell. Just as she expected, the balding butler known as Riff-Raff answered the door.

"Hello…Janet?" said Riff-Raff, surprised by this earthling's reappearance at the castle.

"I need to speak with Frank," said Janet.

Riff-Raff opened the door a little wider, to allow Janet and her dozing son into the castle.

As if on cue, Columbia came running down the stairs.

"Janet?!" she exclaimed, surprised.

"Shh, he's sleeping," said Janet quietly, pointing to her son.

Columbia, eyeing the mop of dark, curly hair on the boy's head, said "Oh god, he's Frank's, isn't he?"

Janet nodded sadly, as Columbia shook her head in sadness. "Frankie's not gonna like this…"

"I won't like what?" asked Frank, as he came down the stairs. He looked disgustedly at Janet.

"What are YOU doing here?" he asked.

Janet smiled weakly. "I need to tell you something important, Frank."

Frank smirked. "Well then, let us discuss this matter…upstairs."

Janet said "Frank, it's nothing like that. I just…"

"Magenta, Riff-Raff," called Frank. "Take the boy with you," he said, pointing to the child in Janet's arms. "Janet and I have something we wish to…discuss."

Janet began to look annoyed. "What I need to tell you has to do with the child," she said, but Frank ignored her and led her upstairs.

Magenta and Riff-Raff carried the sleeping child into a small, dark room. Columbia followed.

"I know what you're doing with that kid," said Columbia, worried. "Don't you even try to…"

"Relax, Columbia," said Magenta. "All we're going to do is watch the boy until the master is finished with Janet."

This didn't ease Columbia. "Mags, I know what you guys did back on Transsexual. I know why you and Riff need to find the heirs to the throne. But why can't you leave this boy alone, just until he's a little bit older? He's only a child for god's sakes! He could…"

"COLUMBIA!" said Riff-Raff, now very annoyed. "Don't you realize what this boy could become? We need to keep a close eye on the Majors family, especially this child! He could turn out to be exactly like his father, and we need to prevent this at all costs!"

"Well fine," said Columbia. "Just don't expect me to help you with this plan of yours if you're going to be wrecking people's lives in the process!" and with that, she left the room, leaving the two siblings alone with the small child.

Riff-Raff smiled at Magenta. "Now to insert the tracking device."

A few hours later, Janet came down the stairs with Frank, looking extremely disheveled.

She smiled. "Well, that wasn't really what I had in mind, but…"

"You enjoyed it?" asked Frank, smiling sensually.

Janet smirked. "After almost five years with Brad, I would go for anything."

Frank's smile transformed into a look of rage. "GET OUT! You AND your son!" he yelled.

Janet then remembered. "Frank, I still need to tell you that…"

Just then, Magenta and Riff-Raff came in the lobby with a drowsy Dick Majors.

Janet grabbed Dick's small hand and charged out of the castle. She didn't care if Frank knew he had a child or not anymore. She had forgotten that he would always be too much of a manwhore to care.

Nine months later, when she gave birth to a daughter, Janet had known it was Frank's. The child didn't look even remotely like Brad. Brad didn't seem to notice this at all, however. Jane was Brad's pride and joy, and as the child grew, Janet was disturbed by how similar her dark hair and, most strikingly, eyes, were to those of Frank's.

Brad would always tell Janet that he was overjoyed that they had such beautiful, perfect children. By herself, Janet would cry about this, knowing that the children would never be truly his, but also knowing inside that he was more of a father to those children than Frank ever would be.

"And I just pieced this all together today, Jane, and it all made sense! I cannot believe that I…"

Dick looked over at Jane, who had not said anything for a while. He sighed. Jane was asleep. _"You can't blame her, though…"_ he thought. _"Kid's been through a lot these past few days."_ Dick tried to sleep, but couldn't block out the memories of the conversation he had just had with Frank…

_"So it's like this for every man in our family?" asked Dick._

_"Yes, it's completely normal, I'm afraid," said Frank. "Though it must have been terrible to go through for you, having been raised an earthling."_

_Dick smiled sadly. "Transvestitism has never sat well with my parents."_

_"It was obvious when they turned up here all those years ago…" mumbled Frank._

_"…She tried to tell you, you know," said Dick._

_Frank looked up at his son. "When?"_

_"That night when she came back again, and you fucked her," said Dick._

_Frank turned pale. "So…she knew," he said._

_Dick nodded. "She regretted coming back that night for the rest of her life. She didn't even try to tell you when Jane was born."_

_Frank looked confused. "But Jane isn't my daughter. Why would Janet…"_

_"All she wanted to do was tell you you had a son, and you got her pregnant again," said Dick. _

_Frank looked like a deer caught in headlights._

"_She was so depressed all her life. On the outside, she was the most cheerful person you could ever know. God, she was annoyingly cheerful! But late at night, when she thought everyone was asleep, I could hear her crying in the next room, really sobbing, and this was almost every night. My god, do you know what you did to her?"_

_Frank glared at Dick. "I suggest you go tell your sister whatever it was that was so urgent that you needed to come here at 4 AM."_


	14. The Flashback Chapter

A.N.- I just felt like clearing some things up before the story goes on since I don't really know how to fit them in anywhere else.

This is a little...backstory...to explain how things got the way they were in the story. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Richard O'Brein definetly does not own this. He does own the characters, however...all ideas are my own.

**Chapter 12: Flashback Chapter**

About a month after that second night at the castle, Magenta had become unexpectedly pregnant. Even though incestuous couples were beginning to become common in Transylvania, they were not allowed to have children unless they were adopted because defects were common in this type of relationship. Since abortions were outlawed in Transsexual because of an underpopulation crisis (most people wanted to sleep around instead of having children), and since Frank would not let them leave the castle to get the abortion and Riff-Raff had no idea how to go about it safely, they decided to keep the child.

Riff-Raff worked painstakingly on a medication that would ensure that the child was normal and had no defects. After getting daily shots of the medicine for most of the nine months, Magenta gave birth to Charlotte, a completely normal child.

Frank was, of course, outraged. Magenta and Riff-Raff had to fight to even enroll the child in school. He agreed to this, only if Charlotte would spend the rest of her life working as a servant for him beside her parents. After a while, Riff-Raff and Magenta regrettingly agreed to this, and their determination to escape the castle was even stronger.

A few years later, the siblings got a job at DTV, the local television station. Frank had told them to do this so they could keep an eye on the Majors family, and possibly find more test subjects for his experiments. They starred in a show called Dentonvale where they played doctors specializing in mental hygiene, Dr. Cosmo and Dr. Nation McKinley. People knew they were siblings, and they were often interviewed about the child that they were seen with only sometimes, since Columbia, whom they had given a job at the studio as a nurse, often baby-sat her. They usually answered to this by saying Charlotte was their niece. They said that her parents had died in a terrible accident a few years before, and that, as the closest relations, they were her legal guardians. No one had the slightest idea that they were incestuous, and this was very good, since incestuous relationships were pretty much unheard of on Earth.

At the studio, they had met up with an old friend from Transylvania: Bert Schnick. He had been the siblings' neighbor when they were children, and now Bert was posing as a blind man to make his TV show, Marriage Maze, more popular. Since people in Denton pitied Bert for his 'lack of sight', they felt it was their duty to watch his show and make it successful. Bert was among the only people at the studio who knew who Cosmo and Nation really were, and how Charlotte was really related to them.

Though Riff-Raff and Magenta had gotten Columbia a job at the studio, things were not on good terms between them. Columbia was still angry about the drastic measures the siblings had taken for their mission, and the siblings were angry with Columbia for not fully understanding the importance of it. Columbia, who was called Ansalong at the studio, fell in love with an intern, Ricky, and desperately wanted to tell him who she and the others really were. Riff-Raff and Magenta forbid this, however, and this could be why Columbia betrayed them when the Majors couple made a surprise appearance on their show.

Janet and Brad had gone to the studio to see what it was all about, and why all of their neighbors loved going there. They had been selected as contestants on Bert's Marriage Maze show, which was arranged by Farley Flavors, Brad's enstranged twin brother, who wanted to steal Janet from him simply to spite him. Brad was then sent for treatment at Dentonvale, much to the surprise of Riff-Raff and Magenta. They worked this into their plan, however, and attempted to brainwash Brad into forgetting that night at the castle through drugs. They did the same with Janet, and tried to make her forget with drugs that were supposed to make her only remember her fame at DTV. This whole plan backfired, however, with the help of Columbia.

When "Cosmo" and "Nation" interviewed Brad and Janet, they asked Janet to sign a contract that basically said that Brad was the property of Dentonvale. Columbia told Janet to sign the contract later, which ended up helping them escape the studio before the drugs could run their course. At the premiere of one of Farley's new shows, Faith Factory, Brad broke out of the mental hospital with the help of Judge Oliver Wright and Betty Hapschatt. He was able to escape with Janet since his stay at Dentonvale wasn't under contract. Magenta and Riff-Raff were outraged. The treatment wasn't finished; Brad and Janet still hadn't fully forgotten about that night.

They asked Columbia if she had anything to do with Janet's not signing the contract, and she denied everything. She threatened to leave the studio with Ricky, and tell someone all about the siblings' evil intentions before they had a chance to mess with anyone else's lives. That night at dinner, Riff-Raff and Magenta mixed a high dose of drugs into Columbia's food that would make her forget all about their plan and the years at the Denton TV studio, but not before Columbia went to Judge Oliver Wright and told him everything that had happened, and who Cosmo and Nation really were. This greatly helped Judge Wright in publishing his book, The Denton Affair.

Columbia never left with Ricky, but instead left with Magenta, Riff-Raff, and an eight-year-old Charlotte to go back to the castle the day after she had been drugged. Dentonvale had begun to get lower and lower ratings since Janet and Brad had left, and it eventually got canceled and replaced with a show that gave frumpy people fashion advice, hosted by Neely Pritt. The siblings had dreaded going back to the castle since it meant they had to go back to their old jobs as Frank's servants, and Charlotte had to begin her servitude since she was now old enough.


	15. Preparing For The Convention

I'M BACK!! WOOOOOOO!! Haha okay sorry. The website has been annoying lately (okay, for at least 3 months) and hasn't let me update. This story's completely finished, and I have three chapters of the sequel already, so...yay! Enjoy, you guys deserve it, more chapters soon!

**Chapter 13: Preparing for the Convention**

When Jane woke up, she didn't know where she was. The room she was in looked different than the room she had grown up in and lived in most of her life. But then she remembered where she was, and what had happened, and sighed sadly.

She looked at the clock on the wall that said it was around noon. Jane looked next to her on the floor, expecting to see Dick lying there asleep, but there was no one there. She began to look around the room, trying to find Dick. Jane decided that Frank had probably forgotten to let them out of the room. She was just about to open the door to leave when she heard voices from the back of the room, behind the large armoire where Magenta had gotten her clothes.

"Are you sure everyone will be looking like this?"

"Well, most of them, but to introduce you as my son, it's good to look something like me."

Jane gasped as she peeked behind the armoire. Her brother was standing next to Frank in full drag, wearing a corset, fishnets, and heavy makeup, looking extremely awkward. Shockingly, he looked almost exactly like Frank.

Frank didn't seem to notice Jane. "Honestly, I don't believe that you've done this before. You're acting like this is such a new experience."

Jane couldn't help it. She started laughing hysterically, almost rolling on the floor, and revealed her hiding spot.

"So, you finally decided to join us," mumbled Frank, annoyed.

"What the hell are you wearing?!" asked Jane between hysterical laughter.

Dick blushed. "Frank said that it would help the guests to adjust to the idea of me being his son…" he mumbled, looking at his stiletto-wearing feet.

"Stop laughing; you're making him even more uncomfortable," snapped Frank. "And you should be used to this. He said he's done this before."

Jane was shocked. "Wow…so…that's why mom and dad kicked you out, isn't it?"

Dick nodded sadly. "They found me in their room wearing those clothes they kept in that old clothing box. I'd done it before, and I guess I thought I'd never get caught…"

"You knew about the box?" asked Jane. "But mom and dad said not to…"

"Who really ever listened to them?" said Dick, smirking in a disturbingly Frank-like fashion.

Jane looked at her feet.

Dick laughed. His sister was always a daddy's girl, following the rules of the house up until she became a teenager and attempted to rebel.

"Oh, come on!" said Jane. "If this makes up for anything, I did look inside that box, and I brought it with me. I thought YOU had something to do with it," she said, looking at Frank.

Frank smiled. "I had everything to do with it, love."

"God, PLEASE don't take me through that story again," said Jane, exasperated. "Riff-Raff and Magenta went through all that last night. It's not fun to think about your father dancing around in drag."

"Well, maybe you'd better get used to it," said Frank, smirking as he began to adjust Dick's outfit.

_Strangely enough, he's right…_ thought Jane.

All of a sudden, Frank looked up. "You mean they didn't take you to the dogs like I instructed?!" he said, outraged.

"…No." said Jane quietly. "They would have had to tell me that stuff anyway though, so, it doesn't really make a difference," she mumbled.

Frank just sat back down in his chair, staring ahead angrily.

"So…how come you're having a convention again?" asked Jane, trying to break the odd silence.

"Our planet has one every year," said Frank, beginning to fix his makeup in the broken mirror. "They decided to hold this year's convention at the castle so I can show off my latest invention."

"Oh…" said Jane. "That 'fountain of youth' thing…right."

Frank nodded. "Oh, you're wanted in the ballroom," he said while teasing his hair.

"…Why?" asked Jane.

"I instructed Magenta and Riff-Raff to teach you two Transylvanian etiquette, so you won't make fools of yourselves in front of the entire galaxy," said Frank.

"How do we get to the ballroom?" asked Dick.

"Oh…take two lefts and a right…" said Frank. "Or was it two rights and a left…" he mumbled.

Dick and Jane left the room they had spent the night in and tried to find the ballroom. They ended up in a dark hallway they had never been in, with lots of twists and turns and what seemed like thousands of doors.

"Where do you think we are?" asked Dick.

"I really don't know…" said Jane. "There's so many parts to this house, there should be a map."

All of a sudden, a hand grabbed Jane's arm.

Jane screamed, and then realized that the hand belonged to Rocky, who was wielding a lighted candle.

"Oh…what are you doing here?" asked Jane.

"I've been looking for you all morning!" he said. "I need to explain about…"

"The servants told me about it last night," said Jane. "As a matter of fact, I-"

"You can talk?" said Dick in disbelief.

Rocky blushed and began to mumble.

"Don't tell ANYONE!" said Jane.

"Okay…but how?" asked Dick.

Rocky had just opened his mouth when another voice was heard.

"It's about time I found you all!" said Charlotte.

Jane glared at Charlotte. "You have some explaining to do. Frank tried to rape me last night. And he was dressed like you."

Charlotte rolled her eyes. "He's done that sixteen separate times to me, dressed in various get-ups meant to resemble my father, my Uncle Bert, and one of the pitbulls from the dog cage. He's a hopeless sex-addict, and he will never change. He'd try fucking with a pear if there was no one around."

Concerned about Rocky's secret, Jane asked "How much did you hear?"

With an odd look on her face, Charlotte said "I only heard you murmuring. I couldn't make out what you were saying, if that's what you wanted to know. Come on, you're expected in the ballroom."

Charlotte led the oddly dressed group of people out of the hallway and into a huge room that had a stage and various punch bowls and was decorated with trinkets so oddly frightening they looked like finds from a Texas thrift store. Magenta and Columbia sat on some steps chatting, and Riff-Raff was examining an old record.

"I thought they'd NEVER get here!" Columbia huffed. She walked over to the large jukebox in the corner of the room, tore the record out of Riff-Raff's hands, and thrust it into the machine, setting it to play.

"Well, the reason you're here is so you can learn the official dance!" said Columbia excitedly.

"They have an official dance?" mumbled Jane, trying to keep from laughing.

"Just go with it, Jane, or they may kill us," said Dick under his breath.

Jane didn't think that these people could actually kill someone, but as her brother had said, she shouldn't blindly trust them.

"This dance is called the Time Warp!" said Columbia. "It was invented by Brian O'Richard in the year…"

"We won't bore you with the details of its history," said Magenta, giving Columbia a look.

Columbia sighed, and then brightened. "Magenta's right. We should just get to the dancing part!"

"How does it start?" asked Dick.

"Well…" said Magenta.

"It's just a jump to the left!!" shouted Columbia while enthusiastically jumping to her left. Dick and Jane awkwardly followed while an old-fashioned rock 'n roll sound began to play out of the speakers.

"Then ya step to the right!" said Columbia. The puzzled earthlings followed.

"So you think this is like their version of The Chicken Dance?" asked Jane sarcastically.

Dick just glared at Jane, and then smiled at Columbia. "So then your legs are spread like this?" he asked.

Columbia nodded. "Yup! Then you put your hands on your hips, and bend your knees in like this!"

"We look ridiculous…" mumbled Jane.

"Then pelvic thrust!!" shouted Columbia, eagerly demonstrating the dance step.

Dick and Jane looked at each other in disbelief. Then Dick shrugged and began thrusting his pelvis back and forth with his hands on his hips and his knees bent in tightly. Jane soon followed.

"Then you jump, and jump again, and stick your hands out like this…."

Columbia taught the Majors siblings the Time Warp until they could do it in their sleep.

"Well, I think you've got it!" said Columbia excitedly.

In the outermost corner of the room, Magenta and Charlotte were whispering with Riff-Raff.

"So tonight's the night?" whispered Magenta.

"It's better to seize the siblings while we can than wait until they get away. The last thing we need is the old judge or that nazi in the wheelchair spoiling our plans," said Riff-Raff.

"But are you sure?" asked Charlotte. "I mean, they seem like nice enough people. Don't you feel bad about kidnapping them?"

"Darling, if this plan works out, we'll be free!" said Magenta. "We can live on our home planet and won't have to deal with the royal family or organizing conventions or anything like that for the rest of our lives! Don't you want that?"

"Well…" said Charlotte.

"Now, listen to me!" said Riff-Raff sternly. "We are your parents, and you WILL carry out your part of the plan. You saw what we were forced to do to Columbia. If it is necessary, we will do the same to you."

Charlotte looked down at the floor. "Yes, father," she said quietly.

"Now I want you to get the supplies out of the box under the lab bed before Frank starts the preparations in there," said Riff-Raff. "Take them into the servant room and hide them somewhere we can get to later."

"Yes, father," said Charlotte, not making any eye contact. She ran into the elevator to get the things from the lab.

"Are you sure you're not being too hard on her, Riff?" asked Magenta.

"Magenta, what are you talking about?" said Riff-Raff, clearly surprised. "As parents, we're supposed to have some authority over our child."

"Yes, but we shouldn't be ordering Charlotte around all the time," said Magenta softly, and she put her hand on Riff-Raff's arm. "Remember when we were that age? We didn't have to go along with any plans, let alone one as elaborate as this."

"Yes, but our births weren't accidental," said Riff-Raff. "Do you think we would have brought a child into this miserable life of ours any other way?"

"Riff, I like to think it was a good accident," said Magenta quietly, after a long pause. Riff-Raff put his arm around her, and they stood there embracing for a long time.

By this time, Jane and Dick were beginning to learn essential things that every Transylvanian must know, like who the last queen was and what was new in pop culture. Columbia seemed to know everything about it.

"So… Tom CRUISE used to be a big celebrity in… in Transylvania?" asked Jane, shocked, but then again, not so shocked.

"Yup. He was originally from the planet Transgender and then moved to Earth," said Columbia. "I've also heard that Mel Gibson's from there too."

"How does she know all that? I didn't even know that," asked Magenta.

"The brainwashing worked well," said Riff-Raff, smirking. "She doesn't even remember that she is an earthling."

After a few hours of learning Transylvanian culture, Columbia sent Dick and Jane upstairs to get ready. The convention was to begin soon, and the McKinleys' plan was about to unfold.

Just when they were about to go upstairs to get ready, Charlotte ran downstairs to report to her parents.

"I hid the supplies behind the dresser, father," said Charlotte.

Riff-Raff smiled, which for the first time in a while seemed to be genuine. "Charlotte, you have done a wonderful job in helping us. I'm… sorry I threatened you before."

Charlotte smiled awkwardly. "Thank you…" she said quietly, looking at her feet. "I knew you would never really attempt to brainwash me."

Riff-Raff and Charlotte stared awkwardly at each other for a few seconds. Then, quickly and awkwardly, Charlotte hugged her father and ran back to the stairs.

Magenta smiled at Riff-Raff, and called back to her daughter. "Charlotte! I think you should spend a little more time getting ready tonight. Looletan Taylor is going to be here."

Charlotte's face bore an expression of shock and excitement. "Looletan Taylor?! Here?!" she squeaked. Then she ran upstairs in utter glee to prepare herself for the actor she had loved since she had first seen him in a popular Transylvanian movie a few years before.

Riff-Raff and Magenta smiled at each other and followed their daughter upstairs, knowing they would soon have a normal life on Transsexual.


	16. The Convention

I love this chapter. A lot. And Bert Schnick makes a cameo. Please try to understand his accent, he really is very sensitive about it you know.

Disclaimer: The new grandfather Richard O'Brien owns the world.

**Chapter Fourteen: Introductions and Surprises At The Convention**

It was now time for the 151st Annual Transylvanian Convention. The guests were just starting to arrive, and they were every bit as alien as Dick and Jane imagined. They stood next to their newfound father and shook hands with the Archbishop of this and the Senator of that for a good part of the night. Every person was shocked that there were now heirs to the Transsexual, Transylvanian throne.

"You mean…. These children were on Earth all this time…so they were not killed in the fire?" asked an elderly man with puffy purple hair and a monocle.

"Yes, yes," mumbled Frank while turning to the next guest. He was starting to get annoyed at all the attention Dick and Jane were getting.

"I can't believe they're this surprised Frank has kids," whispered Jane to Dick in between hand shakings. "He's certainly slept around enough and…"

"BERT! I didn't think you would come!" said Magenta as an older man in a taxi yellow tux stepped into the castle. As greeters, she and Riff-Raff had already seen a lot of guests, but they hadn't gotten this excited over anyone else. Jane noticed this and turned around.

"Vell of course I came!" said Bert. "I haven't zeen you two in ages! And plus, I heard ze rumors about ze new heirs to ze throne. Is it true that zey are half earthling… zat their mother is Jaynet?"

"WAS Janet," said Riff-Raff. "We have already taken care of her." Riff-Raff whispered this last part, trying not to let the obviously spying Jane catch this.

"Good. Zat little bitch destroyed my Marriage Maze show," said Bert in a huff. "By ze vay, how is Charlotte? I haven't seen her zince you two worked at ze studio."

"UNCLE BERT!" Charlotte ran down the stairs and pulled Bert into a tight embrace.

Charlotte pulled away from Bert. Shocked at her new womanly form, Bert immediately began staring at Charlotte's breasts.

"…What?" asked Charlotte, noticing what he was doing.

"Um, nothing. I'm just surprised… you vere only this tall last time I saw you!" said Bert, gesturing with his hand to emphasize. He laughed, trying to distract from the fact that he was just blatantly checking out the young woman he had known as a child.

"That's the guy, Jane! He's one of them!"

Jane was immediately pulled out of her trance. "What did you say?" she asked.

"That's Bert Schnick," whispered Dick. "He ran that Marriage Maze TV show and had a guest starring role on that show Dentonvale that tried to brainwash our parents."

"If only important people are here, why was he invited?" asked Jane.

"Frank told me last night that he only got invited because he's one of the Transylvanian Ambassadors to Earth…you know, they do studies on us and stuff. Anyway, Frank pretty much hates him because he thinks he shouldn't be friends with servants," said Dick.

As if on cue, Frank walked up to Bert and said "Hello, Bert. Long time no see."

Bert turned around and glared at Frank. "Vhere are zey?"

Frank tried to look confused, though he knew very well who "they" were. "Whoever are you speaking of, Bert?"

"No use pussy-footing around, Furter," said Bert. "Ze heirs."

Frank groaned and brought Jane and Dick to Bert. Bert began to look them both over carefully, especially Jane, as she happened to have breasts.

"Vell…ze first ever half-breeds to be heirs to ze throne," said Bert, practically spitting out the words 'half-breeds'.

Dick and Jane didn't dare say a word.

Bert walked over to Frank and looked him straight in the eye. 'Listen to me, Furter. Janet Majors brought ze downfall of DTV Studios, and, like her, her children vill bring ze downfall of Transsexual, Transylvania. Mark my vords."

"Bert, I suggest you go on to the party," said Frank, his teeth gritted.

Bert mumbled something and walked into the ballroom.

"Don't take any notice of him," said Charlotte. "He's a bitter man."

"And a pervert," said Jane. "And, apparently, your uncle."

"Not really my uncle, he's only friends with my parents," said Charlotte. "And yes, he is a pervert."

"Well, I suppose all the guests have arrived. You two should go on to the ballroom," Frank said to Dick and Jane.

Soon, the two Majors siblings found themselves in the ballroom along with the rest of the partygoers. Charlotte had followed, too, as she had been relieved of all duties for the night.

"Is Frank ever going to come in here with the rest of the guests?" asked Dick.

"The master always has a grand entrance," said Charlotte. "He'll be here shortly."

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Magenta and Riff-Raff were in the foyer. Riff-Raff was resting by the door, waiting for the always-possible late guests, and Magenta was pretending to dust the staircase. Neither of them thought that there would be any more guests arriving, as it was already an hour into the convention.

Just then, to their disbelief, the doorbell rang.

Riff-Raff and Magenta looked at each other in surprise. Riff-Raff shrugged and turned to open the heavy front door to the castle.

Riff-Raff opened the door slowly, and saw, to his surprise, two teenaged earthlings.

The two kids, a girl and a boy who looked a few years older than her, were shocked at Riff-Raff's bald butler-ish appearance. They were soaking wet.

"Hi, my name is Paul Davidson," said the boy, thrusting out his hand for Riff-Raff to shake, which he didn't. "This is my girlfriend Lila Hapschatt."

The two teenagers explained that their car had broken down and asked if they could use a phone.

"My cell phone doesn't get service this far out," said Paul, with a hopeful look on his face.

"You're wet…" drawled Riff-Raff.

Paul and Lila looked at the butler like he was insane.

"Yes…it's raining," said Lila.

"Yes," mumbled Paul.

"Yes," said Riff-Raff, as a lightning bolt crashed in the storm. "I think perhaps you'd better both… come inside."

Paul and Lila smiled. "You're too kind," said Lila, and then glared at her boyfriend.

Riff-Raff smiled. It was happening all over again.


	17. Earthlings and Transylvanians

Hey, I'm back, thanks to all who reviewed, especially NationFanatic from rockycast...I gots more! smiles Because I'm putting off studying for my finals at all costs! Next week I'll update lots!!

Disclaimer: Richard O'Brien...yeppers

**Chapter 15: Earthlings and Transylvanians**

Paul and Lila walked into the foyer of the castle, and were clearly disturbed by what they saw.

"Paul, I'm frightened!" whispered Lila. "What kind of a place is this?"

Paul shrugged. "Some kind of hunting lodge for rich weirdoes."

"Oh," said Lila.

Lila and Paul turned to see Magenta staring at them in disbelief.

"Uh…hi," said Paul.

Magenta smirked at the two teenagers and turned back to her dusting, trying to hide her outrage.

"They must be very rich to have servants," Lila whispered to Paul, who nodded.

The two teenagers jumped as Riff-Raff slammed the front door behind them.

Magenta looked at Riff-Raff questioningly. He shrugged.

Hearing the music, Lila asked, "Are you having a party?"

"You've arrived on a very special night. It's one of the master's affairs," said Riff-Raff.

"Lucky him," said Lila.

"Oh, we're all lucky here…" mumbled Magenta sarcastically.

Lila nudged Paul. "Paul, let's get out of here. This place gives me the creeps…and these people!"

"Relax, Lila. These people won't seem as strange once we get to know them better," said Paul, though he was nervous himself, clinging on to Lila like she was his childhood blanket.

Just then, Columbia burst through the ballroom doors. Lila and Paul jumped.

"Oh, more visitors?" asked Columbia, looking at Magenta and Riff-Raff with a half-shocked look on her face.

"Yes…erm…allow them into the party, Columbia," said Riff-Raff.

Magenta glared at Riff-Raff, who gave her a confused look.

Columbia smiled, inwardly gearing up for an exciting night. "All right, let's go!"

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At the convention, Dick, Jane, and Charlotte mainly kept to themselves, Charlotte occasionally remarking on someone's clothing or saying what planet in the galaxy so-and-so came from.

Things had been quite boring until Charlotte saw Looletan Taylor.

"Look! It's him!" Charlotte shriek-whispered, grabbing Jane's shoulder and pointing at an attractive young man with curly brown hair that was wearing a bright green shirt with a purple tie.

"Who's that?" asked Jane, showing interest.

"You don't know?!" asked Charlotte, shocked. "That's Looletan Taylor, the best actor that has ever lived! Plus, he's quite attractive."

Dick smirked. "I hate to break it to you, but only gay men dress that way."

Charlotte glared at Dick. "Speak for yourself, queenie."

Dick blushed and looked at his stiletto-covered feet.

"Plus, all men from Transgender dress in bright colors like that," said Charlotte, defending the actor she was clearly in love with.

Charlotte suddenly grabbed Jane's arm and began walking towards Looletan.

"What are you doing?" asked Jane, trying to pull Charlotte's hand off of her arm.

"Getting his autograph…" said Charlotte, looking for the actor in the crowd.

"But why are you taking me with you?" asked Jane. Charlotte stopped walking.

"You showed obvious interest in him," said Charlotte, smiling at Jane, who had an astounded look on her face. All she did was look at Looletan Taylor!.

Charlotte laughed. "Don't worry, everyone does. He's adorable, and I hear he's always kind to his fans."

Charlotte began charging on through the crowd with Jane (who had given up hope of being free from Charlotte's grip a long time ago) behind her.

Looletan was surrounded by a crowd of women who were all obviously flirting with him, and he was flirting back.

"Mr. Taylor!" shouted Charlotte, trying to be heard over the women's chatter.

"I don't think he'll hear you…" said Jane.

Just as Charlotte was going to call out the actor's name again, the doors flung open.

The entire attendance of the convention gasped.

Columbia stood amused while the two teenagers next to her gawked at all the strange-looking people in the room. The strange-looking people gawked back.

"What are THEY doing here?" whispered Jane, who had always had a hatred of 'perfect' Lila Hapschatt and her Denton High School senior quarterback boyfriend, Paul Davidson.

"I don't know, but one thing's for sure," said Charlotte. "This is going to be the most exciting convention in twenty years."

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Back in the foyer, Magenta and Riff-Raff were having an argument. Riff-Raff was clearly aggravated, sitting on the couch with his head in his hands.

"Why did you let them in?" asked Magenta, angrily pacing across the room. "You know what happens when we interfere with earthlings. I thought you said we were finished with this!"

Riff-Raff sighed. "Magenta, we will be leaving later tonight. What does it matter if we have a little fun with the earthlings?"

"Fun?!" asked Magenta. "Are you saying that spreading our existence to Earth's masses is fun?! Are you saying that it will be AMUSING to you when we have to search for more heirs to the throne, get another job just so we can 'keep tabs on' another family, and do this all over again?"

"No, Magenta…" said Riff-Raff. "I am only saying that this plan is foolproof, and we might as well…"

"You said the LAST plan was foolproof!" said Magenta, cutting her brother off and then, clearly giving up, sat next to her brother on the couch and sighed.

"Something has been bothering me," said Magenta.

"What?" asked Riff-Raff, looking up at his sister with concern.

"Even if this plan does work… what will we do?" asked Magenta. "We've been working for the master for years. How will we get by?"

Riff-Raff smiled and pulled Magenta closer to him. "You have no need to worry, my beautiful sister. There are surely many more people like us on our home planet… we can patent the elixer I made when you were with child. And I can always get a job working in a laboratory somewhere. I have lots of experience, as you know."

Magenta smiled, but immedietly remembered the argument she had just had.

"Riff-Raff," she said sternly, turning to look at her brother. "Please promise me this one thing: these earthlings will not interfere with us getting back to Transsexual."

Riff-Raff smiled. "I promise."

All of a sudden, Riff-Raff pulled Magenta even closer to him and began to kiss her neck. Magenta laughed and embraced him tightly.

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"Everyone, we have some unexpected guests," said Columbia. "Some…local guests."

A grumble of voices could be heard from the room.

"Well, we can all agree they're in for a treat tonight, huh?" said Columbia, raising her voice to be heard over the crowd.

There was a mumbled response. Lila and Paul looked at each other with uncertainty.

Charlotte began to walk towards the young couple.

"What are you doing?" whispered Jane.

"Relax, I know how to handle these kind of people," said Charlotte, smiling devilishly.

"Yes, it just so happens that you two have the privilege of entering Frank's laboratory," said Charlotte, walking up towards Lila and Paul.

Paul and Lila looked confusedly at Charlotte.

"Do we… know you from somewhere?" asked Paul.

"Probably not…" said Charlotte with a smile.

Lila shook her head. "No, I know I've seen you before. Do you go to Denton High?"

Charlotte heard the laughter of the crowd, and when she looked behind the young couple, she saw Frank leaning against the side of the elevator, amused.

"The name's Charlotte McKinley," said Charlotte, "and I think you should turn around."

Paul and Lila did turn around, and the sight of Frank made Lila shriek and faint into Paul's arms.

"Wh-who are you?!" asked Paul, shaking. "WHAT are you?!"

Frank laughed. "Why, I'm just a sweet transvestite from Transsexual, Transylvania."


	18. Frank's Speech

Here's a nice little short chapter for you. We learn something shocking! Dun dun dun is right!

Disclaimer: Monsieur O'Brien vont au cinema. (translation: Richard O'Brien goes to the movies. Cuz I don't know how to say hw owns the world in French.)

**Chapter Sixteen: Frank's Speech**

Frank strutted past the frightened couple to the stage at the other side of the ballroom. As he approached the microphone, the Transylvanian guests applauded him, which brought Lila back to consciousness.

Frank cleared his throat and began his speech. "Fellow Transylvanians…" he began.

"This convention is going to be quite different from any other convention, not only because of my glorious scientific breakthrough, but the discovery of two heirs to the Transsexual, Transylvanian throne, which was previously thought would end with me. May I please ask these two heirs to come up onto the stage?"

As the Majors siblings stood on the stage, one on each side of Frank, they were applauded by the representatives of every planet in the galaxy of Transylvania.

Lila nudged Paul, suddenly shocked. "Paul, look! Aren't those the Majors siblings?" she whispered.

Paul looked harder and his eyes went wide. "What are they doing here?" he asked.

"I don't know…" said Lila. "But I guess that man is their father."

Paul snorted. "That explains a lot."

One of the older Transylvanians nudged Paul and Lila. "Quiet, the Prince of Transsexual is speaking!"

Lila looked at Paul. "Then does that mean…"

"I said QUIET!" the Transylvanian whispered even louder this time, causing a few heads to turn, including Frank's, who stopped talking.

"As I was SAYING," said Frank, agitated, "The heirs to the throne are attending their first convention tonight, as they were raised earthlings and were previously undiscovered. They…"

As Frank went on, Charlotte began to get bored. She turned and saw her parents slip in the room, looking extremely disheveled.

Charlotte's eyes narrowed. "What were you two doing?" she whispered.

Magenta and Riff-Raff smiled at each other. "Oh, nothing," said Riff-Raff.

"Well, you missed those kids' reaction to Frankie. Priceless," said Columbia, rushing toward the two siblings.

"Was it like this with Brad and Janet?" asked Charlotte.

"Exactly like this…" said Riff-Raff.

"Though we don't want anything to get out of hand like last time," said Magenta, looking at Riff-Raff and motioning towards Dick and Jane.

Columbia smiled and tried to stifle a giggle. "Frankie's not gonna like it when you say he can't play with the guests."

"Yes, but we'll figure something out," said Riff-Raff, not entirely sure of that.

"I told you not to let them in," said Magenta, glaring at Riff-Raff.

Riff-Raff sighed. "You're always right about things like this in the end."

"And you're just learning this now?" said Magenta, smiling.

"I guess I'm just a slow learner," said Riff-Raff, smiling back.

Charlotte rolled her eyes. Her parents always acted like this after make-up sex.

Jane noticed Columbia discretely slip away from the convention and into the foyer.

"And I suggest that, in a moment, all of you make your way up to the lab by using the stairs in the foyer," said Frank, finally ending his speech. "Let the 151st Annual Transylvanian Convention begin!"

The guests to the convention applauded and began to do as Frank had said. Frank got off the stage and began to walk towards where the young, paralyzed-with-fear couple was. Dick and Jane followed him.

"Well…" said Frank, examining Paul and Lila. "What brings you two here?"

"Our car broke down and we need to use a phone…" mumbled Paul, looking at his feet.

Frank chuckled. "A likely story. May I suggest that you come up to the lab with the rest of the guests?"

"Um…well…we really just needed to use a phone, sir," said Lila, clutching her boyfriend.

"That can be dealt with later," Frank snapped. "Magenta, Riff-Raff, Charlotte, and Columbia; Prepare the guests."

"Columbia seems to have disappeared, master," said Charlotte.

Frank huffed. "Well, then, the convention will just have to go on without her. Charlotte, take Columbia's place in the demonstration. Dick and Jane, you will follow me upstairs."

Jane watched as Magenta, Riff-Raff, and Charlotte began tearing clothes off Paul and Lila, who panicked and began to protest. _"This is priceless,"_ she thought. _"Simply priceless."_ She then followed Frank and Dick into the elevator that took them up to the lab.

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In the dark part of the castle's upstairs, Columbia was as quiet as a mouse. She was looking for a room she had often visited in her years of neglect from Frank.

After several minutes, she finally found the room. No one else knew about it, since the room was in a wing of the castle that was never ventured into. No one knew what went on in this room, either.

She opened the door, and a male voice said, "I've been waiting for you all night."

Columbia entered the room and locked the door behind her.

"Sorry I took so long; it looks like we're going to have earthlings at the convention again."

She fell onto the double bed, looking lovingly into the eyes of the man she had secretly been seeing almost every night for years.

"You know nothing good can come from this," said the man, concerned. "What if Frank's children know them? It will all be like the night-"

Columbia quieted the man by putting her finger on his lips. "Everything will be fine. These kids won't hurt anyone."

Then she sighed. "Look, I know I've asked you this about a trillion times but, are you SURE you don't remember anything? You have half of Eddie's brain for god's sakes!"

The man frowned. "You've asked me this so many times, I'm beginning to think that's the only reason you're with me!"

Columbia looked hurt. "Of course not, Rocky. I just want to know if you… you know, felt like you had a part of him in you."

Rocky smirked. "Well, we all ate him, didn't we?"

Columbia's eyes burned with rage. "NEVER talk about that. That was one of the most painful moments of my life, and it'd be real nice if you didn't bring it up right before we fuck, all right?"

Rocky smiled seductively. "All right, then, let's get on with it!"

Columbia smiled as Rocky began to hold her close and kiss her tenderly, trying to forget how nice it was when Frank had done the same. Though she always remembered Eddie fondly, she knew she would never get over Frank. She had fallen head over heels for him, though he hadn't showed any love for her for years. She knew that if she could just talk to him, just really talk to him, she may be able to get his attention again, at last.


	19. The Fountain of Youth

This chapter has people beating each other up...

Disclaimer: God, Richard O'Brien, do you have to own everything??

**Chapter Seventeen: The Fountain of Youth**

In the lab, Frank told Jane and Dick to stay on the viewing ledge with the Transylvanian guests. They followed his orders, though reluctantly, as they were still slightly afraid of the brightly-clothed visitors. However, they did enjoy listening to their gossip about past conventions.

"I was here twenty years ago at the 131st convention," said one middle-aged woman, "and you will never guess what happened! Prince Furter killed one of his own creations who disturbed his demonstration by crashing through the freezer with his motorbike!"

"I heard that was an earthling they killed," said one man.

"Well," said the woman, haughtily, "I was there, wasn't I?"

Dick tapped the woman on the shoulder. She abruptly turned around and became flustered.

"Oh, um…" she said, wringing her hands. "It's an honor to be speaking with you, erm…"

"Dick," said Dick.

"Well, we just met, it's not time to consider those things now!" said the woman, nervously laughing.

Dick, uncomfortable about his newfound celebrity, said what he had meant to say from the moment he nudged the woman. "It WAS an earthling they killed…a delivery boy named Eddie."

"OH! Oh yes, that's right!" said the woman, laughing and twirling a strand of her hair. "How silly of me to forget!"

Jane looked at Dick in disbelief. Dick just shrugged and said "Look! They're here!"

Everyone on the ledge directed their attention to the two underwear-clad earthlings stepping out of the elevator with the servants trailing behind them.

Jane couldn't help but notice proudly that she had larger breasts than Lila.

Frank was holding his hand out for the guests to shake. Paul Davidson, an avid hand-shaker himself, accepted.

"The name's Paul Davidson," said Paul, giving Frank a hearty, manly shake, "and this is my girlfriend Lila Hapschatt."

Frank took Lila's hand and kissed it. Lila giggled politely and realized she rather liked that, almost frightening herself.

"Well, how nice," said Frank, checking out Paul profusely as he was of the muscled, manly type that was otherwise known as Frank's type.

Frank smirked. "And what charming underclothes you both have." The crowd laughed at this, as it was true: Paul was wearing the largest pair of underwear anyone had ever seen on a man in their lives.

"Well here, put these on," said Frank, handing white cloth robes to the couple. "They'll make you feel less, erm, vulnerable."

The crowd laughed again. Dick seemed entranced in the charisma of his father.

After taking a sip of the champagne in his hand, Frank continued. "It's not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them hospitality."

"Horse brutality?!" said Lila. "There's no horses here, and as a vegan and an animal rights activist, I have to say, sir, that…"

Frank glared at Lila. "I said HOSPITALITY." The crowd laughed once again.

"Hospitality?" said Paul, getting angry. "All we wanted to do was use your telephone, god-dammit, a reasonable request that you've chosen to ignore!"

Lila grabbed Paul's arm to calm him. "Paul, don't be ungrateful."

"UNGRATEFUL?!" yelled Paul, outraged.

Frank smiled devilishly. "How forceful you are, Paul. Such a perfect specimen of manhood. So…" said Frank while blatantly staring at Paul's rather large package, "dominant."

Paul uncomfortably tightened his robe as Frank turned to Lila.

"You must be awfully proud of him, Lila," he said, smiling.

"Well, yes I am," said Lila, giggling girlishly.

Making more small talk, Frank turned back to Paul. "Do you have any tattoos, Paul?"

Paul shook his head. "Certainly not."

"Oh?" said Frank, not at all surprised. "How about you?" he said to Lila, who shook her head and giggled.

Riff-Raff appeared from nowhere and said, "Everything is in readiness, master. We merely wait your…word."

Giving him a nasty look, Frank thrust the champagne into Riff-Raff's hand and walked up to the stage, where Magenta and Charlotte, both wearing surgical masks, were standing either-side a microphone.

"Tonight," said Frank, "my unconventional conventionists, you will witness a new breakthrough in biochemical research, for what I have discovered will change the lives of every Transylvanian from this day onward!"

The crowd gasped.

The servants' faces were lacking even the slightest bit of excitement. "_Where's Columbia when you need her?" _thought Jane.

Frank smiled proudly. "This discovery took five years to complete, and I am living proof of its effectiveness! For what I have discovered is that elusive, fabled substance: the fountain of youth!"

The crowd gasped, and one man shouted, "So it wasn't surgery!"

Frank glared at the crowd and continued, walking over to a fairly large and sturdy cage containing two puppies that were taken from the kennel located somewhere in the castle. Magenta and Charlotte followed him.

"These two…erm…earth creatures seem exactly the same. They are both youthful and full of energy. Yet there is one difference. One of these…" Frank looked at Magenta who mouthed the word 'dogs', "dogs is twelve years older than the other." Frank smiled as the crowd gasped in disbelief.

"Yes, one of these dogs has been treated with the Youth Serum that I devised single-handedly."

Riff-Raff was glaring at Frank, knowing that he had done all of the work.

"Yes," said Frank, "One day it just came to me that I was not the only person who had ever wished they could stay young forever. So, right then, I started working. In the beginning I worked nonstop, once for an entire week!"

The crowd gasped. Riff-Raff's blood boiled. He was the one who had worked for an entire week without stopping, with multiple whippings from Frank in between to keep him going.

Frank smiled. "But I, as you all knew I would, gallantly kept on. I worked harder than I ever worked before. I lost ten pounds since I would work straight through meals."

As the crowd gasped in amazement once again, Riff-Raff tried to stop himself from lunging at Frank. He was the one who had worked straight through all meals, and he had lost twenty pounds, much to the worry of Magenta and Charlotte.

Frank's eyes went wide. "But then…just about a year into the project…I realized that I had done it all wrong. I needed to start the long, tiring process of feeding the needs of the people all over again. I had lost hope. But then I listened to the words of the old queen, my mother: 'Never Lose Hope'. So I decided not to lose hope and hoped to find something that would give me hope to finish this project, hopefully."

The crowd laughed. Jane couldn't believe how enraptured they were in his speech.

"But I kept on. I was by myself for months, locked in the lab and working straight through the day and night, without any food. I survived by…"

Just then, Riff-Raff lunged at Frank, holding him down and punching him in the face.

Magenta ripped off the surgical mask. "Riff-Raff, what are you doing?!"

"Something that should have been done a long time ago!" shouted Riff-Raff, surprisingly much stronger than Frank N. Furter.

"Father, stop!" said Charlotte, also ripping off her surgical mask. "He's going to…"

Just then, Frank, who had gained a sudden burst of energy, pushed Riff-Raff off of him and stood up.

Frank looked at Riff-Raff with no emotion. "Turn around," he said.

"No! Not again! Not here!" said Charlotte, cowering against her mother.

"I said, turn around," said Frank, persistent.

Riff-Raff reluctantly turned around and took off his long overcoat as Frank pulled out a whip that looked like it had been around for years. The crowd gasped.

Frank began to angrily whip Riff-Raff, who was showing signs of pain, but was taking it well. It was obvious that he had been through this many times before. Charlotte was sobbing and embracing her mother, who looked like she was close to tears, too.

"How can he do this?" Jane asked Dick. "It was his fault Riff-Raff jumped on him. He was egging him on!"

"Jane, he deserves it," said Dick forcefully. "He's a servant and he misbehaved."

Jane looked at Dick in disbelief. "But he took credit for Riff-Raff's work! And look at Charlotte and Magenta! How many times do you think they've gone through this?"

Dick snorted. "Lots, judging by how well the cripple's taking it."

Jane looked at Dick again, not sure who she was seeing anymore. Then she knew what she had to do. She ran down the ramp, grabbed the heaviest item she could (a huge glass beaker) and smacked it over Frank's head. Frank fell onto the floor, out cold.

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Columbia and Rocky had just begun to take their clothes off when they heard a huge bang and a roar of gasps from the lab.

"What was that?" asked Columbia, pulling away from Rocky, who only shrugged.

Columbia pushed herself off of the bed. "I guess we'd better check it out."

"No," said Rocky. "I'll stay here. I don't feel like facing that bastard again after what he said to me last night."

Columbia began to fix her hair in the mirror. "Are you sure? I think this convention just started to get exciting."

Rocky nodded.

"Well, just make sure you don't get caught up here," said Columbia, adjusting her corset.

Rocky smiled. "We've been doing this for years. Do you think we're going to get caught tonight of all nights?"

Columbia smirked. "Hey, anything can happen."


	20. Shock and Dissaray

This is possibly the longest chapter I have ever written for anything, ever. So have fun, stuff happens in it (never would have guessed, huh?)

I'm almost done, there are only 23 chapters in this story, but I'm on chapter 5 of the sequel, so there's way more where this came from!

Disclaimer: I don't have to repeat it again. Somewhere, Richard O'Brien is laughing at me.

**Chapter Eighteen: Shock and Disarray**

Jane stared in disbelief at Frank's body, limp and lying in broken glass. The McKinleys stared back at her, clearly in shock that she had knocked the Prince of Transylvania out cold in order to save Riff-Raff.

Dick sprinted down the ramp, desperate to save the convention.

"Well, uh, there's refreshments in the ballroom!" Dick smiled awkwardly as he tried to speak over the roar of shocked and dismayed voices.

Dick strutted over to Jane. "Well, I hope you're happy. You've knocked our father out and ruined this year's convention."

"What's going on with you, Dick?" questioned Jane. "You never used to be like this."

"Well, I never knew I was a royal before, now did I, Jane?" said Dick, smirking in a manner very much like Frank's.

"That shouldn't change your entire personality," said Jane, concerned.

Dick sighed. "So, what do you suppose we should do with him?" he asked, desperate to change the subject.

Stepping out of the elevator, Columbia gasped. "Oh my god, Frankie!"

Magenta glared at Columbia. "Where have you been?" she asked, furious.

"Nowhere," Columbia said. "But it seemed like something much more exciting was happening in here."

Columbia gasped as she saw Riff-Raff lying on the floor, his back bloody and blistered. Charlotte was still crying, holding her father's hand.

"What's happened to Riff, Magenta?" asked Columbia, her voice full of concern.

"The master whipped him again, Columbia," said Magenta, sadness in her voice.

Columbia sighed. "He really can be terrible… sometimes I wonder why I even still..."

Magenta sighed and immediately began to tend to her brother.

"Riff, don't put yourself in danger like that!" said Magenta as she began to wrap up some of Riff-Raff's wounds with gauze.

Riff-Raff smiled. "It was worth it. Just to see the look on his face."

Charlotte smiled through her tears. "We're just glad you're okay, father."

As Dick scowled at the servants, Jane began to inspect Frank's unconscious body.

"Someone should bring him up to his room," she said.

"I will," said Columbia, eager for the chance to be alone with Frank.

Jane looked suspicious. "All right, Columbia, you take Frank up to his room and stay there until he wakes up, got it?"

Columbia nodded happily. After initially struggling to pick Frank up, she found a wheelchair behind the elevator. Elated, she rolled Frank into the elevator and went up to the top floor, where Frank's bedroom was.

Jane looked confused. "What was a wheelchair doing there?"

Dick smirked arrogantly. "Well, what do you think? The only person we know who uses a wheelchair is…"

"Doctor Everett Von Scott!" said Riff-Raff, sitting up so fast that he re-opened some sores and winced.

Magenta's eyes went wide. "What could he be doing here? He can't be here, he would have…"

"He could have slipped in with one of the larger groups of guests," said Riff-Raff.

"Somebody had to have pushed him in if he was using his chair," said Charlotte.

"I bet it was that Judge Oliver Wright," said Riff-Raff angrily. "He's been on our case since the years at Dentonvale."

Realizing what had just slipped out, Magenta glared at Riff-Raff, who gave her a pleading look.

"Don't worry, we knew already," said Dick, annoyedly.

"Where do you think they could be?" asked Jane.

"I'll check the monitors," said Riff-Raff, trying to stand up, but in too much pain to do so.

"Charlotte, can you check the monitors?" asked Magenta, looking at her brother with concern.

Nodding, Charlotte turned to the television-like box, pulled the lever, and immediately saw an image of Dr. Scott and Judge Wright, the local criminologist, studying a marijuana cigarette in a room that was exotically decorated.

"They're in the Zen Room!" shouted Charlotte.

"They're always in the Zen Room…" mumbled Riff-Raff.

"Wait…" said Charlotte, studying the screen. "There's someone else with them!"

"Let me see…" said Jane, running over to the security device.

Charlotte gasped. "That's Betty Hapschatt, isn't it?"

Jane studied the grainy picture on the screen. "Yeah, that's her. She's probably looking for Lila."

Charlotte smirked. "Plus, she's always joined Judge Wright on his little 'expeditions'."

Jane raised her right eyebrow, a talent she had now suspected had come from her true father.

"What's _that _supposed to mean?" she asked.

"Don't you know? They've been going together for years," said Charlotte.

"And how did YOU know this?" asked Jane.

Charlotte smiled. "You hear an awful lot of gossip growing up at a television station."

With the help of Magenta, Riff-Raff limped over to the video screen. "Whoever's there needs to leave before things get worse," he said.

"Um, excuse me…" said a voice coming from the back of the room.

Everyone turned around to see Lila Hapschatt practically hiding in the arms of Paul Davidson.

"…Can we please use a phone now?" she asked.

"Sorry… we forgot about you…" said Jane, smiling inwardly.

Magenta smiled. "So…what do you think we should do with them?" she asked quietly.

"I thought you were against fooling with the earthlings," said Riff-Raff, a shrewd look on his face.

"It's like you said, darling…" said Magenta. "We've got nothing to lose."

Riff-Raff smirked. "So…since the master has been…detained… we need to find someone else to play with the guests."

Charlotte had a huge smile on her face. "I know just the person for the job."

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"Oliver," asked Betty Hapschatt, almost sick with grief. "Where do you think they could be?"

Judge Oliver Wright sighed, plopping down in a conveniently-placed chair. "They could be anywhere, Betty. It could take hours to find them."

Betty Hapschatt buried her face in her hands and let out a loud sob.

Surprisingly, Dr. Scott was standing upright, not needing to use his wheelchair. "Don't give up so soon, Betty. If they were anywhere at this hour, they'd be here. I'm sure of it," he said.

"How could Lila do this?" shrieked Betty, in between sobs. "It's that good-for-nothing boyfriend of hers, I bet."

"Now, now," said Judge Wright, putting his arm around Betty. "They probably just had car trouble. That's the same thing that happened with Janet and Brad."

Betty looked up at Judge Wright, uneasiness in her eyes. "I can't believe that you think that story is true. You know they just came up with that to…to…"

"Why would they make something like that up?" asked Judge Wright, gloating inwardly, knowing he was right.

"I know for a fact it's true," said Dr. Scott. "After all, I was there."

Betty glared at Dr. Scott. "Why should we believe you when you didn't tell us you could walk until tonight, after all the years you've known us?"

Dr. Scott sighed. "Betty, I can only walk for short periods of time because of my injury from the war. If I used my chair tonight, Frank N. Furter could use his magnet and catch us before we escape with Lila."

"We could have already been caught," said Judge Wright. "Furter has security cameras all over this castle, from what Ansalong told me."

Betty sighed. "Oliver, Ansalong was screwy enough as it is. I don't understand how you could write an entire book based on what she told you."

"I have proof, Betty," said Judge Wright, "and proof is greater than any…"

"Excuse me, but what are you three doing in my house?"

The three adults turned to see Charlotte, leaning against the door frame.

After a long pause, Judge Wright cleared his throat. "Hello, is there a Lila Hapschatt at this residence?"

"Follow me," said Charlotte. "Tea's on in the kitchen."

"Yes, but is Lila here? In this house?" asked Betty hopefully.

Saying nothing, Charlotte walked down the hallway to the kitchen. Judge Wright, Betty, and Dr. Scott silently followed.

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Looletan Taylor, drowsy from the drugs a mysterious group of people had given him, was shoved into a dark room with dim red lighting. Much to his surprise, someone in the bed in the center of the room gasped sharply, making him nearly soil himself.

"Who's there?" a woman's voice asked.

"It's only me, Lila," said Looletan. _"Where'd that come from?"_ he thought. Why was he alone in a room with one of the earthly guests?

Lila sighed, relieved. "Oh, Paul, thank goodness it's you. I thought it might have been…"

"Who else could it have been?" asked Looletan, afraid of being found out.

"Well, don't just stand there, come into bed!" said Lila.

Looletan's heart started pounding. If he went into her bed, Lila would know he wasn't Paul.

"Um, well, Lila, I think I'll just sleep on the floor tonight," he said. "I mean, it's just nice to have you near me. For comfort reasons."

Lila sighed. "Look, it's not like we haven't done this before."

Looletan looked up, surprised. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"You know what I mean," Lila said. "Now come on in bed and do that thing you did last night."

Surprised and excited, Looletan climbed into bed with Lila, not even thinking about the consequences.

Lila gasped. "You're not Paul!"

Looletan smiled nervously. "No, but…since he's not here…"

"Of course," said Lila, grinning seductively.

"Y-you didn't seem this, erm…" stammered Looletan as Lila unbuttoned his shirt.

"Experienced?" asked Lila, smiling sweetly.

Looletan nodded, beginning to sweat.

"Oh, I've been doing this for years," said Lila. "My mother doesn't know. My father doesn't care."

"But what about your boyfriend?" asked Looletan.

Lila smirked. "Darling, do you think that you're the only man I've cheated on him with? Now come on, we don't have all night."


	21. The Night Continues

This chapter is amazingly long, too...enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't need to disclaim anything, dammit!

**Chapter Nineteen: The Night Continues**

Once in his room, Columbia laid Frank on his bed, wiping his face with a wet rag.

"Col…Columbia…"

Columbia looked up at the awakened Frank excitedly.

"Yes?"

"What happened?" said Frank, wincing in pain and putting his hand to his head.

"I'm not exactly sure, Frankie," said Columbia. "I walked into the lab and saw you lying on the floor with broken glass all around you."

"Ah, well, I must have just fallen in the middle of my work. My job is quite exhausting, you know," said Frank.

Columbia smiled. His "accident" had made him forget the entire night's events.

"Tell me," said Frank. "How did I get here, then, if I was passed out in the lab?"

"I brought you up here, Frankie," said Columbia, kneeling at the side of Frank's bed.

"I always knew you were here for some reason, Columbia," said Frank with a genuine smile on his face.

"You know…I'm here for other reasons, too…" said Columbia, a hopeful tinge in her voice.

"Well…" said Frank sensually, "you know I'm always ready for _that_."

Giggling happily, Columbia jumped onto Frank's bed, hoping that their relationship could be saved by a night's escapades.

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Charlotte slowly stirred her tea as her "guests" looked at each other nervously.

"So…" said Judge Wright. "Charlotte, is it?"

"You remembered," said Charlotte without enthusiasm, staring at her cup of tea.

Judge Wright cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"Honey, where are Nation and Cosmo?" asked Betty Hapschatt.

Charlotte just shrugged, her teacup staying the center of her attention.

"How are Dick and Jane adjusting?" asked Dr. Scott.

"As you most likely expected. Dick's in women's clothing and Jane's…well…surprisingly, she's not giving in to the master's influences," said Charlotte.

"What do you mean?" asked Judge Wright.

"Well," said Charlotte, finally looking up from her beverage, "she knocked the master out cold with a lab beaker."

"Stronger than her parents…" mumbled Judge Wright.

Suddenly, Betty hit the table with her fist.

"I can't take this any longer!" she said, the tears already starting to flow. "WHERE is my LILA?!"

Showing no emotion, Charlotte said "If you wish to see your daughter alive, end these outbursts immediately."

"So she's here?" asked Dr. Scott.

"You will stay the night," said Charlotte. "The master has many events planned for this year's convention, and they will not be canceled because of his being…unavailable."

"You were always such a sweet girl," sobbed Betty.

Just then, Magenta and Riff-Raff slipped into the room.

Looking up from the hands that covered her face, Betty asked, "Cosmo? Nation? Is that you?"

Riff-Raff and Magenta both had surprised looks on their faces.

Betty seemed very excited to have her "friends" back.

"Oh, it's been so lonely at DTV without you two," said Betty, wiping her tears away. "Why did you leave all those years ago? I heard Farley was going to pick Dentonvale up for another season."

Her vison unblocked by tears, Betty took another look at "Cosmo" and "Nation".

"Who are you?!" shouted Betty.

Judge Wright cleared his throat. "Betty, these people ARE Cosmo and Nation McKinley. You may recall that they were only actors."

"My father is a real doctor," said Charlotte.

"Oh, sweetie," said Betty, a tone of sadness in her voice. "You must know by now that those two aren't your real parents. They're your aunt and uncle."

Charlotte, Magenta, and Riff-Raff grinned at each other, amused.

"Betty…" said Dr. Scott, "there's something you should know."

Riff-Raff smiled at Magenta. "My sister and I have been in a…relationship…since we were teenagers."

Betty's eyes looked like they would pop out of her head.

"And I am proud to be called an 'accident'," said Charlotte, laughing with her parents.

"Their real names are Riff-Raff and Magenta McKinley," said Judge Wright.

"Oliver…" said Betty, "I want to lie down."

"Nonsense," said Charlotte. "And miss tonight's festivities?"

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Looletan Taylor softly closed the door to Lila's room. After getting lucky with her, he felt invincible. He crept toward Paul Davidson's room, let himself in, and closed the door behind him.

Paul gasped. "Who is it? Who's there?"

"It's only me, Paul!" said Looletan in a high-pitched voice.

"Oh, Lila, thank goodness it's you," said Paul. "I thought it might have been…"

"Who else could it have been?" asked Looletan.

"Well don't just stand there, come into bed!" said Paul.

This time Looletan didn't hesitate. He swiftly climbed into Paul's bed, hoping for satisfactory results.

Paul gasped. "You're not Lila!"

Looletan smiled. "No…but since she's not here…"

Paul grinned sensually. "Of course."

"You didn't seem this, erm…" said Looletan as Paul threw off his already unbuttoned shirt.

"Experienced?" asked Paul.

Looletan nodded excitedly.

"Oh, I've been doing this for years," said Paul. "My father doesn't know. My mother doesn't care."

"But what about your girlfriend?" asked Looletan.

Paul smirked. "Do you think you're the only man I've cheated on her with? Now come on, we don't have all night."

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Columbia sighed, her head finally hitting the bed's pillow.

"Oh Frankie, that was…"

"Spectacular?" asked Frank, an arrogant smile on his face.

Columbia smiled and turned to face Frank. "As always."

Suddenly, Frank's smile faded and was replaced with a look of grief.

"What's wrong?" asked Columbia, frowning.

Frank sighed. "Oh, nothing," he said. "It's just… the last few days have been… well, taxing on my emotions."

Columbia nodded, listening intently.

Frank crossed his arms, a thoughtful look on his face. "It is very hard for a man of my position to deal with sudden…er…"

Columbia smirked. "Fatherhood?"

"Erm, yes," said Frank, blushing slightly. "That."

Columbia giggled. "Well, then, why don't you go and ask Riff?"

Frank scoffed. "Him? What would he know?"

"Look at what happened to him and Magenta," said Columbia. "They dealt with it."

"I suppose so…" said Frank.

"So, go and talk to him, Frankie," said Columbia. "He wouldn't jump on you for it."

Frank nodded. Then, he had a sudden realization.

"That worthless, sniveling IMBOSILE!" shouted Frank, standing up sharply.

"What?!" asked Columbia, confused.

"That…that…CRIPPLE…leaped on top of me as I was giving my speech at the convention!" said Frank. "I whipped him immediately after, of course, but never in my whole life has..."

"Then how did you end up covered in broken glass?" asked Columbia, interrupting Frank.

Frank thought a minute. Then, he remembered, a look of utter disgust on his face.

"That…my…" Frank sighed. "Majors' girl smashed a lab beaker over my head to stop me… I don't understand how anyone that came from…me…could have such compassion for that vile creature."

"He's not vile," said Columbia. "Jane probably noticed the torture you put that family through and wanted to stop it."

"I never tortured them!" shouted Frank. "After they had their precious daughter," he said, practically spitting out the words, "I not only allowed her to live in my home, but to become educated! I even allowed them a few years on their own, out of the castle."

Columbia looked confused. "When was that?"

"Oh, don't give me that," sneered Frank. "You went with them."

Columbia's face was a complete blank.

"Oh god…" muttered Frank. "THE TELEVISION STUDIO. You were with them. In Denton. For four years."

"I don't remember that at all, Frankie," said Columbia, a look of concern on her face.


	22. Plots and Punishment

**Chapter Twenty: Plots, Punishment, and Oblivion Deceased**

Through all of this, Jane tried to clean up some of the mess the conventionists had left in the lab while Dick bickered with her. Aggravated, Jane furiously flung the mop she was using back and forth across the floor.

"Why should WE be cleaning," said Dick, "when our father has servants?"

Jane sighed exasperatedly. "I thought it would be nice, okay? They went through hell tonight."

"Well, what about us?" said Dick angrily. Walking across the room, he sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his dark curly hair.

"Dick?" asked Jane, concerned. "Are you feeling all right?"

"Oh, yes, Jane!" shouted Dick, darkly sarcastic. "I feel GREAT! In the past week, my parents have died, my house has burned down along with everything of value, and my true father has let me be who I…always wanted to be," said Dick, shaking his head. "But that's not necessarily a good thing."

Dropping the mop, Jane walked over to Dick. "Why not? Sure, you're not exactly the same person you were a week ago, but you're not the only thing that's changed."

Dick smirked. "Well, of course not. It just…well, it shocks me that…" Dick sighed. "I've felt like this all my life, and for the first time…I don't feel like it's totally unnatural anymore, you know?"

Jane nodded. "Of course, after seeing Frank…"

Dick chuckled. "Look at me…I look like one of his clones!"

Jane laughed. "It's a little scary, if you ask me."

Smiling, Dick said "Well, you'd better get used to it. After all, I'm first in line for the Transylvanian throne."

Jane snorted. "That's frightening."

"Why?" shouted Dick, offended.

Taken aback, Jane said "Well…I don't know…It's just really weird to think of you, my own brother, as royalty, I guess..."

"You are too, you know," said Dick, seemingly calmed down.

Jane frowned. "I…I really don't want to leave for Transsexual, Dick. We're going to, probably very soon, and I just… I know it'd be amazing and all, and they'd treat us like gods, but too much has changed lately. I can't deal with it. If you go, write or something, okay?"

Dick's look turned to one of quiet rage. "I guess you just aren't cut out for the royal life. Go and live with the servants, then. You're barely a step up from one of them yourself."

"Maybe that's better, then," said Jane.

Dick chortled. "And what is THAT supposed to mean?"

"This new power has made you mad!" shouted Jane.

"Why are YOU so unaffected by it?" shouted Dick.

Jane sighed. "Look, Dick, I don't know what is happening to you, but there must be a reason for it. Don't you remember the old days, when you lived at home, and mom and dad were still alive? They guarded us from this for a reason. I'm not sure it was this specific reason, but they knew that coming to this place, seeing these people, would…well, change us in some way. It must have changed them, too, that first night they came, or else they would have been more inclined to tell us about this."

Dick looked confused. "What's your point?"

Jane let out a sigh of frustration. "You know what, Dick Majors?…or, Dick Furter, whatever they're going to call you now. I hope you become prince of Transsexual, Transylvania. I hope you get all the women…or men...that you could ever want! But, judging from the way you're acting now, I'm sure that you'll be the worst ruler that has ever existed, in any galaxy!"

In a fit of rage, Dick slapped Jane across the face. Clutching her face in shock, Jane turned to see Frank and Columbia standing near them in the lab. They had apparantly been there for a long time.

"Now, now, children," said Frank, an evil smirk covering his made-up face. "We'll have none of that."

Frank walked across the room, and came back with something that made Jane want to scream and run away from that house for good.

Handing Dick the whip, Frank said "It's better to use this."

Columbia gasped. "Frank, WHAT are you doing?!"

Glaring, Frank said "She deserves it. She is a servant and she misbehaved."

Letting out a shriek of rage, Columbia ran out of the room, searching for help.

Her eyes wide and now overflowing with tears, Jane screamed "DICK! You can't DO this!"

Staring at the whip in his hands, Dick looked overcome by emotion, not sure whether to obey his newly-found father or set his sister free.

Frank leaned against the wall, smiling devilishly, clearly enjoying all of this.

As he raised the whip in the air, Jane's eyes shut tight as she braced herself for the intense pain she would soon be feeling.

Suddenly, Dick lowered the whip, looking down at the ground, sadly.

"I…I can't do this, Frank," said Dick.

Crying out with relief and greatfulness, Jane whispered "Dick, I don't know why I ever doubted you."

Frank smirked, and even chuckled a little. "I thought so."

Jane and Dick both had a look of confusion on their faces.

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Running down the hallways of the Frankenstein Place as fast as she could, Columbia slammed against Rocky, who was walking down the hallway, and they both fell over onto the ground.

"What's the rush?" asked Rocky.

"It's Frank! He's going to whip his own children!" said Columbia. "They're in the lab!"

Angered even more at Frank, Rocky ran to the lab.

Columbia finally reached the kitchen, gasping for breath as Betty, Oliver Wright, Dr. Scott, Charlotte, Magenta, and Riff-Raff jumped in surprise.

"He…He's…" said Columbia, still winded from the run.

"What is it, Columbia?" asked Riff-Raff, concerned.

Betty gasped. "It's Ansalong!"

"He's whipped her!" shrieked Columbia. "For saving Riff-Raff!"

Magenta stood up. "Where are they?"

"In the lab, hurry!" said Columbia, running out of the room. Oliver Wright, Betty Hapschatt, and Dr. Scott followed close behind. Charlotte, Riff-Raff, and Magenta were left standing in the kitchen.

"Well…are we following them?" asked Charlotte.

Riff-Raff shook his head. "No, Charlotte. We must prepare for…departure."

"If we have some kind of punishment inflicted on us, we would never be able to go through with the plan," said Magenta.

"You two get ready," said Charlotte. "I'll be in the lab." With that, she sprinted out the room, catching up quickly with the others.

Magenta and Riff-Raff looked at each other and shrugged. Then they hurried to the servants' room. The night's events were just beginning to unfold.

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"What do you mean 'I thought so'?" asked Dick, outraged.

Frank smiled. "Only a strong ruler would whip their own sister."

Dick's mouth hung open, a look of dismay on his face. "Are you saying that I wouldn't make a good ruler?"

Frank smiled. "Oh, I've said nothing of the kind."

"FURTER!" shouted Dr. Scott, entering the room with the rest of the group.

"Oh, you," sneered Frank. "How nice of you to join us."

"Thank god," sighed Jane, trying to crawl away from Dick and Frank.

Frank snatched the whip from Dick's hands.

"You are not going to touch her, Furter!" shouted Dr. Scott.

Disregarding the doctor, Frank turned to face his son.

"If you're going to be the new prince," said Frank, "you're going to have to learn how to whip misbehaving subjects."

Jane shuddered, knowing what would be coming next.

Frank raised the whip high. "This is how you're SUPPOSED to do it."

"STOP!"

Everyone turned to look at Rocky, who was standing, determined, in front of the elevator.

"Rocky!" shouted Frank. "I thought you had…"

"No, I never stopped talking," said Rocky. "This is wrong what you're doing, and you know that."

Frank kept staring at his creation in shock. "You're so…articulate."

Rocky blushed. "Well, I _have_ been around for twenty years, now."

"Oh, Rocky," said Frank, sensually, strutting towards him in a love stupor. "I don't know why I ever believed that you shouldn't be able to speak. I actually find it rather…attractive."

"Well…" mumbled Rocky, blushing as Frank began "examining" him, trying to find out how he developed the ability to talk.

"Pardon me, master…" said Charlotte, entering the room, "but what the hell do you think you're doing?"

Frank looked away from Rocky. "Oh…you," he said, disgust in his voice. "What does the inbred mistake want now?"

Slightly shaken by this, Charlotte said, "You're not a very good father."

"Well, I didn't exactly ask for the job, did I?" huffed Frank, walking towards the girl.

"That does not give you any right to treat Dick and Jane as you have been," said Charlotte unwaveringly.

Just as Frank began to rebut this, a disheveled Paul, Lila, and Looletan walked into the room.

Betty gasped and ran over to Lila. "Baby, I was so worried! What happened?"

Playing innocent, Lila said, "Oh, mother, it was TERRIBLE! Paul and I had a flat, and we asked to use the phone, but we got stuck here, and…" Lila then burst into fake tears.

"Shh, it's all gonna be alright, honey," said Betty, clutching Lila in her arms.

Paul turned to Betty. "I'm sorry about this whole mess, ma'am. I knew I should have gotten that spare tire fixed."

"You stay away from my Lila!" screeched Betty. "This will never happen again, you hear me?"

Frank rolled his eyes, and raised the whip again to get everyone's attention. Everybody gasped.

"Well, then," said Frank, "There must be some other form of punishment, if physical discipline is out of the question."

Thinking, Frank paced the floor as Jane stared at the whip, still in his hands.

Deciding on a plan, Frank smiled evilly. "This time you WILL go to the dogs. I will escort you myself. And you," he said, looking over at Charlotte, "You will also be punished."

Before they could say anything to protest, Frank grabbed Charlotte and Jane's arms and led them to the dog kennel.

Betty, Judge Wright, Dr. Scott, Lila, Paul, Dick, Rocky, and Looletan all looked around at each other, not sure what to do.

All of a sudden, two oddly-clothed people walked into the room. One was holding a laser.

One by one, the female half of the two turned the people into plaster statues. She grinned at her male counterpart, and just as they were about to leave, a voice stopped them in their tracks.

"I want answers," said Columbia, walking towards the siblings. "Why can't I remember anything?"


	23. Seclusion

Hi, just so you know, this is NOT the last chapter. I just had too many author's notes so the count is off. You have to look at the chapter number on the actual page, not the little drop-down thing. This chapter's only 21, so there's 2 left. Then I'm gonna wait on the sequel, I think, because I'm uploading a prequel about Riff, Mags, and Charly. It's coming, though, it's just not ready yet because I have really bad writer's block.

And I can't help but noticing the influx of Riff/Mags fics, some with children, on ...woohoo!

Disclaimer: Richard owns everything in this story except Charlott, Jane, Dick, and the storyline itself. So ha-ha, Richard. Ha ha.

**Chapter Twenty One: Seclusion**

After practically dragging them down the hallway for what seemed like ages, Frank thrust Jane and Charlotte into a dark room, lit only by a flickering light bulb dangling from the ceiling. He slammed the door behind them. The room was freezing, and the two girls could see their breath. Ferocious barking was coming from a cage in the corner of the room that contained four rottweilers.

Jane cringed at the sight of the dogs. She was always slightly afraid of the large ones. Charlotte walked over to one of the dogs and pat its head. It instantly calmed down and started wagging its tail.

When Jane gave her an odd look, Charlotte grinned and said, "These are my mother's dogs. I played with them as a small child. They wouldn't hurt a fly."

Jane let out a sigh of relief, but then realized something. "How long do you think he intends to keep us in here?"

Charlotte smirked. "Oh, probably until tomorrow morning." A few moments later, Charlotte's smile turned to an expression of shock. "That can't happen!"

"Why?" asked Jane, shivering. "We'll freeze?"

"No!" shouted Charlotte in annoyance. "This is the night we were going to…" She stopped herself.

"Going to what?" asked Jane.

Charlotte fell to the floor, her face in her hands.

"This is the night we were going to leave."

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Riff-Raff and Magenta glanced at each other nervously. Then, smiling sweetly, Magenta asked, "Why, Columbia, what would you like to know?"

"Don't play dumb with me!" screeched Columbia. "I don't remember anything about a 'Dentonvale' or a television station at all! You two must have brainwashed me!"

"Where did you get this information from?" shouted Riff-Raff in outrage.

Columbia smiled. "Frankie asked me about it, and when I didn't remember," Columbia's face dropped, "I became…concerned."

"Wait…" said Magenta, "he TALKED to you?"

Columbia beamed. "Yeah, Mags! And we did MUCH more than just talk…"

Magenta raised her eyebrows as Columbia giggled. All of a sudden, Columbia transformed into a laughing, plaster statue.

Magenta gasped in surprise as she turned to look at Riff-Raff, one of his hands on the Medusa switch.

"Why did you do that?" asked Magenta.

"Telling Columbia about her brainwashing would remind her of the reason we did it," he said. "That would dramatically affect tonight's plans."

Magenta smiled. "I suppose the master is ready for the floorshow." She looked around. "Where is Charlotte?"

Riff-Raff looked shocked. "Did we Medusa her by mistake?"

"I'll check the monitors," said Magenta, concerned.

After looking through fifteen empty rooms, Magenta finally found Charlotte and Jane. She sighed in relief. "They're in the dog kennel. Charlotte AND Jane."

Riff-Raff looked into the monitor. "Furter must have locked them in there."

Magenta smiled and held up a key.

"He forgot that those are MY dogs."

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To pass the time, Jane and Charlotte had been talking. Then the subject Charlotte had dreaded came up.

"I'm sorry to ask you this again," said Jane, "but are you SURE you have no defects because of your parents? They said in Health Ed that that's highly unlikely from parents of…familial relations."

Despite her nervousness, Charlotte handled the question well. "Almost nothing. My father came up with this potion sort of thing that he injected to my mother every day and it worked perfectly…except for this."

Charlotte pulled off her heeled shoes and fishnets to show off her bare feet. Her left pinky toe was missing.

Jane gasped. "Nine toes?"

Charlotte laughed. "It's more of a quirk than a defect. Besides, once we're out of here, my father's medicine will be patented, so all incest babies will be missing their left pinky toes. I won't be alone anymore!"

They both laughed. Then, after a long pause, Jane became completely serious.

"Look…I'm sorry for cutting off your hair in the first grade."

Charlotte gasped and laughed in surprise. "That was you?!"

Jane looked confused. "I thought you knew…you were pretty cold towards me the day I came here."

Charlotte smirked. "Sorry about that. I'm like that with new people sometimes. It's from my parents. Plus, I was kind of angry that you were taking my room…"

Suddenly, the doorknob rattled and turned, revealing two siblings in space invader outfits.

Charlotte ran to the doorway and hugged her parents. "I knew you wouldn't leave without me."

Magenta smiled. "We would never do that."

"You're part of the reason we're leaving, after all," said Riff-Raff.

Jane had a sudden realization. "Does this mean Dick and I are going to Transylvania with you?"

Riff-Raff's eyes went wide and he turned to his daughter. "You told her?"

Charlotte shrugged. "She would have found out soon anyway. She must hate Frank after tonight, so what could she do?"

Magenta nodded. "Charlotte's right. She can do no harm."

Riff-Raff sighed. "Okay, then. Let's go to the ballroom…the floorshow is about to begin."

The McKinleys smiled at each other in a knowing way. Jane wondered what the full extent of their plan was…and how they would get past Frank.


	24. Takeover At The Floorshow

Well, my friends, we have reached the end. Today I'm uploading the last two chapters of this story. Enjoy, review, and I'll try to get the sequel up ASAP.

**Chapter Twenty Two: Takeover At The Floorshow**

Frank stared at the eight statues in thought, wondering what kind of floorshow he could put on with the large number of people.

Despite this, he began to pose them in different places on the ballroom stage. He then covered them in bright makeup, feather boas, and corsets.

Before the show began, Frank moved Oliver Wright, Dr. Scott, and Betty Hapschatt off the stage for the time being. No one wanted to see middle-aged performers in one of his floorshows, especially Frank.

As the floorshow began and each player sang their own special part, Charlotte, Magenta, and Riff-Raff were readying themselves just outside.

"I'm going backstage," said Jane, "to see what exactly is going on here," and ran off.

Magenta nodded in approval. "It's better that she's back there…less chance of an accidental killing."

Riff-Raff smiled and set the laser.

Backstage, Jane first noticed the scantily-clad statues of Betty Hapschatt, Oliver Wright, and Doctor Scott. She cringed, and was confused as to how Frank had enough time to make statues of them.

Jane then watched her brother do his part in the show, and realized that his girlfriend would probably kill him if she found out…if she was even real.

The music changed to some sort of fanfare, and there was Frank, standing in the middle of the stage in all his glory. As he began to sing, Jane noticed a certain part of him grew to twice its size.

"Whatever happened…" sang Frank, always singing the same lines, "to Fay Wray? That delicate, satin drape frame…as it clung to her thigh…how I started to…" Frank stopped singing and gasped as he spotted Jane, crouched on the floor backstage. "YOU!"

Jane was torn between running and screaming for help. To her surprise, Frank brought her onstage and showed her off to the invisible audience. "Ladies and gentlemen…my latest discovery."

Frank began to bow, and gestured for Jane to do the same. Jane looked around, not sure who her father was performing for.

"Frank…" said Jane. "There's no one here…"

Frank shook his head. "No wonder Janet was your mother…can't you see it's a full house? They're giving us a standing ovation!" With that, he went back to bowing in different, always flamboyant, ways.

Frank then motioned for the rest of his 'cast' to come back onstage. "It's time for the finale!"

Jane cringed, wondering if the McKinleys were going to be arriving soon as she was manipulated into joining a chorus line by the seemingly brainwashed Dick, Columbia, Rocky, Lila, Paul, and Looletan.

Everyone but Jane seemed motivated by some silent applause by an invisible audience, as they were bowing and blowing kisses for what seemed like an hour.

Suddenly, the doors to the ballroom crashed open. Riff-Raff, Magenta, and Charlotte were all in the space invader garb, and Riff-Raff was pointing a laser towards the people on stage.

"Frank N. Furter!" shouted Riff-Raff, "It's all over! We return to Transylvania tonight!"

Released from the trance, the performers looked at each other and their clothing confusedly as Frank stared at the McKinleys, looking sincerely afraid. Riff-Raff and the others began to walk slowly towards him.

Dick gasped. "You're not going to kill him, are you?"

Magenta laughed darkly. "Of course not."

"Then…what?" asked Betty Hapschatt, who had walked out on stage with the other older folks.

"The visitors must leave the castle, now," said Charlotte.

"Why?" asked Looletan.

Riff-Raff smiled and pointed his laser at the stage. Everyone gasped at this, and Lila, Paul, Betty, Oliver Wright, Dr. Scott, and Looletan ran off stage, as well as they could in stilettos, and left the castle for good. Only Frank, Columbia, Rocky, Jane, and Dick were left standing in fear.

"Frank N. Furter…" drawled Riff-Raff as he inched even closer to his sworn enemy, "you have caused pain and suffering in all of our lives. So tonight…we are taking action."

"I will contact the authorities about this," said Frank, trying to regain his composure. Riff-Raff just chuckled darkly.

"You won't be able to after what I do to you, Furter," said Riff-Raff, and he pointed the laser at Furter.

Charlotte put her hand on her father's shoulder. "You promised not to kill him. That only causes more trouble."

Riff-Raff, about to protest, visibly changed his mind and sighed in defeat.

"You must know that you are not going back to Transylvania with us," said Magenta. "Riff-Raff, Charlotte, and I are leaving…along with your children."

Frank's look was utterly blasé. "They deserve to see their homeland…I was planning on taking them there myself in the coming years."

Riff-Raff smiled. "That may be, Furter, but YOU will never enter the planet Transsexual, nor the galaxy of Transylvania ever again!"

Frank scoffed. "And what is stopping me from going back?"

Riff-Raff thought for a moment, and then smiled, remembering what Columbia had just revealed to them. "You will stay on the planet Earth for the rest of your days…" he turned, pointing the laser in a different direction, "or Columbia will be sacrificed instead."

"What?!" Everyone on stage gasped. Columbia burst into tears. Frank didn't know what to do…he had always been fond of that cheerfully irritating redhead.

"This was not part of the plan, Riff!" shouted Magenta.

Unfazed by this, Riff-Raff grinned and asked, "Have you made your decision, Furter?"

Columbia gave Frank a pleading look.

Riff-Raff tried to mask a look of surprise as Frank said and did nothing. "…No? Well, then," he smiled, "we'll proceed."

As Riff-Raff began to walk towards Columbia, Rocky, driven by love, stepped in front of her and screamed "NO!". Riff-Raff shot the laser too late. The beam of light missed Columbia and hit Rocky, instantly killing him.

"NO!" screamed Columbia, and crumbled to the floor, clutching the muscleman's now limp body. She sobbed while Frank stood on stage, looking out of place. Dick and Jane did not know what to do or say.

The McKinleys looked at each other in shock and anger. They had not wanted to kill anyone this time.

Frank, demonstrating some sort of emotion, crouched on the floor next to Columbia and put his arm around her. Columbia looked at Frank in astoundment, and pushed him off of her. 

"You cause Rocky's death, and almost cause mine…" screeched Columbia, "and now you think THAT'S going to fix everything?"

Frank's lips moved, yet no sound was heard.

"You know what, Frankie?" said Columbia. "You…you are the most selfish, horrible…ACK!" Columbia shouted, threw up her hands in defeat, and started sobbing again.

Unsure of what exactly they should do, Riff-Raff announced, "Columbia, Frank N. Furter…you should leave before we set off for Transsexual."

Columbia looked up. "I knew that you'd make me stay here. You always try to manipulate me! For years of my life, I looked after Charlotte for you as you filled out phony prescriptions for the unwilling participants on your television show, trying to hide the fact that she was your daughter and not your niece, and even Ricky said…" Columbia gasped. "You DID brainwash me! I remember it all!"

Magenta and Riff-Raff looked at each other nervously.

Charlotte glanced in her parents in surprise. "You never told me that you…"

"You know, why are Dick and I even here?" asked Jane, interrupting. "Less than a week ago, our lives were completely normal, and now we have to worry about rabid transvestites wielding whips and a butler with a loose hand on a laser gun!"

Frank, finally speaking up, scoffed and said "You're parents are dead. That's why you're here. Your mother was insipid enough to dump you two on me."

Jane laughed bitterly. "That will was an obvious fake…there is no way that my mother, being the woman that she was, would leave me and Dick to you. You already attempted to kill one of us." Jane shook her head in sadness. "I just want to know why this all happened."

Charlotte looked at her parents, mixed looks of fear and guilt on both of their faces.

Quietly, driven by conscience, she said "The will was a fake."

"What?" asked Jane, looking up, tears now streaming down her face.

Riff-Raff and Magenta looked in horror at their daughter, who completely ignored them.

"We drew up the will," said Charlotte, louder this time. "The only way we could be free was if we brought you and your brother to Transsexual."

Jane stood on the stage staring back at Charlotte, her expression made of stone.

Tears now forming in her eyes, Charlotte whispered "We killed your parents, Jane."


	25. Crawling On The Planet's Face

The last chapter. So sad. But the sequel will be up soon.

**Chapter 23: Crawling On The Planet's Face**

Jane, still standing at the center of the stage, looked as if she had forgotten how to breathe.

"We didn't know you then. This was planned for a long time," said Charlotte. She turned around. Her parents were looking at her with faces of utter disgust.

"I trusted you," Jane said. "I kept Frank from pummeling you…I defended you!"

Charlotte shook her head. "Jane, I…"

"No," said Jane. "Don't even try to make excuses. You three killed my parents. Whatever the reason, there is no excuse for that." She shook her head. "Dick warned me not to trust you. And I am not leaving for Transylvania with you, not now, not ever, at this point. I chose not to go from the start, but this has just confirmed it."

Riff-Raff said quietly, "We only ever needed one of the heirs."

Looking over to Dick, Jane said, "So, what's your say on the matter? Are you still leaving for Transylvania, even with our parents' murderers?"

Dick, his face made of stone, stepped towards the McKinleys.

Jane, a look of disgust and shock on her face, shook her head and said, "This whole prospect of being royalty has really driven you power-mad. You're leaving your family, friends, and entire life behind to be this flamboyant figurehead of a…"

"I never had a life!" shouted Dick, still staring stonily ahead. "I've never truly lived! I've always felt that I was meant for more than this, that I never revealed who I really was inside. The truth is, Jane…you don't even know me. That house I told you about? It was an apartment above a convenience store run by a guy named Perez, and it was held up every other month. Me and my roommate would go to this club every Friday night. I would be dressed up like this, and we would get completely wasted and do most everyone in the club, waking up in unfamiliar houses every Saturday, sometimes Sunday morning."

Jane, her mouth open, did not know what to say.

"So, then…" said Dick, looking directly at his sister, "Now you know the real Dick Majors. Now you know why Mom and Dad kicked me out. Apparantly being a sex fiend is genetic, in this case."

Frank smirked, and Columbia elbowed him in the shin.

Dick looked around. "And I believe…" he said, "that it is now time for you to leave. We will be departing shortly, as you know."

Jane glanced at Frank and Columbia, and then turned to leave. Columbia followed, and stared back at Frank, not budging from his place on the stage. Finally, Frank turned to look at Columbia, then glanced at Dick, an odd look of pride in his eyes, and followed the others offstage.

Magenta let out a gasp of breath once they disappeared. "Charlotte, what were you thinking?!" she shouted.

"That was incredibly irresponsible of you," doubled Riff-Raff.

Charlotte shrugged. "I was just doing what I thought was right. You two, more than often, do the opposite."

Dick looked at Charlotte, a slight look of admiration in his eyes. He averted his eyes once she caught his glance.

Riff-Raff shook his head. "Well then…" he said, "shall we?" He led the others to the control room, where they would program the house for flight.

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Outside, Jane sat on the ground, fishnets and all, waiting for the eventual liftoff of the house, trying to recount what had just happened. The cool breeze of midnight felt odd on her skin. Frank and Columbia stood on either side of her.

"All of us…" Jane said, "…we're going to be alone. You two hate each other and…well…I have no family to speak of now."

Frank had a small smile on his face. "You must know you're wrong about that."

Jane looked up at Frank. "This comes from the man who, in the past few days, has tried to rape and murder me."

Frank smirked. "Regrettably. But you know I can never leave you, now…we're a part of each other."

Jane looked up and smiled at Frank. "I guess you're right."

Frank then turned to Columbia. "And I've never hated you, Columbia, in any way."

Columbia, still looking at her feet, smiled sadly. "You should have told me that before all of this happened."

"We can move far away from here," said Jane, no expression in her voice. "We can live under false names, and never have to speak of this again."

Columbia shook her head. "You know how that turned out for your parents."

Jane frowned and nodded.

"We don't have to decide all of this now," said Frank.

Jane sighed. "I suppose you're right."

"Wherever we end up, we'll survive," said Columbia.

Frank put his arm around Columbia as the house began to lift off, swirling dust and debris around the three, lone people in the huge forest clearing. For once, the people in this place did not have to crawl and search for one another. They knew exactly where they were.

**THE END…?**

** (Sequel coming soon)**


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